blues of never knowing anything until it is far too late

I'd shoot down the sun if it would blind the whole world

just so I wouldn't have to see you one more time

I'd cross every ocean, land on every shore

run to the devil and sign on the dotted line

 

memories are like tattoos that stick onto the cerebrum

and the past is like the present missing a hint of the future

everything is circular, because we are all born to die

just leave me in my defeat and I'll relish in my torture

 

It's hard to win a fight when you are fighting with yourself

impossible to escape when there is no where else to go

no one can see the future if they don't know where it is

after all of this I just wish I had something to show

 

after all of this I wish you weren't gone

 

Reviews

[jessfoundwonder]

i know this feeling.
i thought some lines were really good like "everything is circular, because we are all born to die" and "It's hard to win a fight when you are fighting with yourself
impossible to escape when there is no where else to go
no one can see the future if they don't know where it is
after all of this I just wish I had something to show"

but others (like the whole first stanza) don't really flow and seem forced.

but overall it's really really good (:

[John Stussy]

Definitely been in this kind of situation, feeling the bite of it still. Well done, you write in a way that makes your readers able to relate to you with ease.

[bluessadmood]

how i liked the title..
i would shoot the sun just to blind everyone
so i would not see you again
would cross every ocean,land on every shore
run to the devil and sign on dotted line
everything goes in rounds as we are born to die
leave me in my defeat,will relish in my torture
hard to win a fight ,when its with yourself
will not escape when no where to go
how will they see tomorrow if they dont know where it is
this lovely this is so nice,how beautiful and poetic everything here
how i loved this..
lovely write..

[Rachel DeHart]

I find the second stanza very witty and well laid out. I love the flow through this whole thing, and I agree with Anita, the finishing line is amazing.

This has a lot of strong points to it. Great work.

[Anita B Jacques]

Impossible to top your emotions, very strong, the finish superb. Well done, thank you for sharing.