You're Mine.

Another love poem XP

  I was running

  Away from my

  Problems.

  I was broken,

  I was tattered,

  I was sick and

  Tired.

  But then I

  Found you.

  You made me

  Stronger.

  You gave me love.

  You made me

  Put down the razor,

  And face everyone else.

  You are everything now.

  You are mine. 

 

Author's Note

:P Review please! :)

Reviews

[James Horsley]

Your writing is good. Truly. Nothing wrong with this piece, exactly. It's good, and I believe you really feel what you're writing, as it doesn't come across as artificial at all. I do suggest a little editing, though, just to make it shine a bit more. Give it a couple reads through, and see if you can't find a few places to tweak it, and make it truly yours. I mean this in the most constructive way: you could truly OWN this poem if you'd go in, expand on a few lines, and rework it to make it speak for itself in your own personal voice. I won't give away any particular lines, you'll learn more if you look for it on your own. =)

[Midnight_Mystery]

short and sweet. wonderful poem :)

[A.E. Surdam]

Ahhhh. It was so cute and beautiful at the same time, in the same manner. It reminds me of my stories on the male, possesively says "You're mine". Gives me shivers all over thinking out it. It would be so romantic, in my view, for a man you find yourself in fancy with to pin you down and hover breathing in a hot breath across you skin, growling, "You are mine. And no one will touch you, so help me." Maybe that's me. Others might find it a little frightening. Though it has never happened to me before. Ohhhhhhhhhh. So pretty and passionate. Thank you, for allowing me to read it. Here I go, babbling on again. - A.E.S

[Fabric Pulse]

I have a poem called "Runner Indeed" and another called "Street Pages" which seem similar in struggle. Perhaps we're all running from something as we also run towards our life. It gets old, but it's new. We're stronger in the tribulations!

[Miss Sally Sunshine]

I like this one. This shows the real love of an amazing friend or boyfriend/girlfriend. These kinds of friends/lovers like this are usually very rare. Great job.

[compositionc]

That was sadly friendshiply poem.

[Coyote Poetry]

" I was broken,
I was tattered,
I was sick and
Tired."
People who accept us at our worst. We appreciate for they see us at our worst and still want us in their life. A very good ending to a outstanding poem.
Coyote

[Sukriti Suki]

good one.

[halflives]

Wow, this is powerfully written. I believe that everyone will have someone at one time or another that takes them away from their pain and brings them into the lights. Very well done.

[Jessi Berlasty]

" Put down the razor,
And face everyone else."

You don't need a comma there. Other than that I found no mistakes. Good job!

[HopelesslyDevoted]

very in depth story, it leaves the reader wondering.... "what next?"