MY LIFE IS HARD

MY LIFE IS HARD

A Poem by afra

Cursed by the darkness of love

Had a great fall from above

So I feel low


These painful regrets

Wont let me forget

Forget what I have lost

Wishing I could have it back at any cost


This world is filled with lies

They snatch your dreams

And place them on fire


The arrow of lies  hit me so deep

That I cry even when I sleep

It has given me never ending pain

And now these wounds won't heal

Cause they were given by

The people I love


My life is so hard

That its neither passing

Nor ending

© 2012 afra


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Reviews

"And now these wounds won't heal
Cause they were given by
The people I love"
The pain is deeper when the people who support to care and love us create pain and hurt. Thank you for the emotional journey in the excellent poem.
Coyote

Posted 12 Years Ago


The arrow of lies hit me so deep
That I cry even when I sleep

Great lines right there... I can feel your pain

Posted 12 Years Ago


Dark, but it has a defiant aknowledgement to it which I can appreciate. "At any cost." Theres that sense that the character is prepared to do whatever it takes to be whole. Indeed the soul can be ruthless in pursuit of its happiness. The world being what it is, it sometimes it has no choice.

Posted 12 Years Ago


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JC
My life is so hard
That its neither passing
Nor ending...

this is my favourite part of the poem, the final thought that sums up everything you are feeling. good job.

Posted 12 Years Ago


Although I agree with Tomislav--there is more to life than love-- the surfaced anguish here is undeniable. A couple spelling/grammar issues that made me frown. A second editing would do this piece a world of good. I also agree that your inconsistent rhyming made this poem stumble a bit.
I wish you the best of luck with your heartbreak troubles.

Kind regards,
Savannah

Posted 12 Years Ago


Very sad ... yeah, guess you came back to what comes out naturally for you xD
metrica is interesting, alternation of triplets and quatrains (or longer stanzas),
rhymes work and flow too, I particularly enjoyed first stanza where you give "love" a material sense, you link it with words ("dark" and "great flow") that links better to a material thing than a feeling.
Great job =D

Posted 12 Years Ago


Good poem, though it would be better if it had a consistent rhyme.
I like the metaphors; you've done an amazing job with them, though personally, having troubles with love isn't what I would call having a hard life.
Well written.

Posted 12 Years Ago


My imagination ran wild with the line "the arrow of lies hit me so deep". To me it was very intriguing imagery. Nice job.

Posted 12 Years Ago


Wow tears of sadness crept over my heart :( It's all true beautiful job!

Posted 12 Years Ago


perfectly written..a melancholic poem with fantastic use of imagery.

Posted 12 Years Ago



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Added on June 25, 2012
Last Updated on June 25, 2012

Author

afra
afra

Toronto, Mississauga, Canada



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