Mutual Surrender

hmmmm

I lust after the geometry of your being,

poised on top of me to explore,

like a birthday present waiting to be

u n w r a p p e d...

I pull you closer to me,

closer than the spaces of our kisses,

defying distance dividing the contours of our flesh

until we become

consumed with the fire void of chaste intentions,

slaves to the urgency of the moment

...and y-yesss

let's pour out our words of love into this feverish motion,

unrestricted by rhythm,

unbounded by time--

until we lose ourselves

and find ourselves

in each other

collapsed. . . . . . .in mutual surrender

Author's Note

Okay, it's been quite a long time since I last wrote a poem. Unlike before when I could write nonstop, this one took ages. Any comments would be welcome. :)

Reviews

[DrD]

It may have taken ages, but it will also be remembered for ages. I love your passion and eloquence of expression. There are times when words convey more than meaning and this is one. I was enraptured by the urgency of this writing and enjoyed it tremendously. Extremely well done.

[Sami Khalil]

You make your beloved surrender to your passions and your readers surrender to sensuality...Bravo.........

[Blue]

Thanks a lot, Sami!

[Sami Khalil]

You are welcome...:)......................

[Eric Pudalov]

Whewwwwwww! Arzel, this is incredibly sexy and titillating. I love the way you describe everything, like "I lust after the geometry of your being/poised on top of me to explore," and the way you highlight certain words, like "unwrapped."

It really gives a sense of the sexual experience, the way it can be paced, slowly happening in a seductive rhythm. So too, do I love the simplicity of the line, "and y-yesss..." What's great about sex is it can take some of the most articulate and verbally expressive people, and just melt them into wordlessness. Sometimes there are very few words to describe it!!

And "mutual surrender"...what a perfect title. If both people are perfectly in tune with each other, and with the moment, I'd say that's really what it feels like. I am blown away.

[Blue]

Aww. Now I know what you mean when you said it's better for you to elaborate your review because it's more helpful. :) Thank you so much, Eric. Yours is the best comment for this poem, I think. You got my point correctly. :)

[Dayran]

I think I'll have a cigarette now. Thanks.

[Blue]

Haha. I'll take that as a compliment. Thank you, Dayran!

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

Worth the time it took to write it Hun, because it was great as are all your poems.
It was filled with passion, heat,desire and romance.
It was a very steamy little piece :P
Your very talented hun, i enjoyed this one to.
Keep writing :)

[Blue]

Thank you so much, Cimmy! I enjoyed your review. Have you sent an RR recently?

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

you're welcome and i think so

[Jennie Baron]

I'm glad you have returned to poetry, Arzel. I absolutely love it. Steamy is the word, very erotic.

[Blue]

Have I strayed away from poetry, Jennie? :) Hmm, thanks a lot! Took me ages to finally get this done.

[Jennie Baron]

Sometimes the ideas that come to us quickly are the best; sometimes the best ones are those we've considered for a while. Some of the poems I've recently published are rewrites of some I've been ruminating on for years.

[Frieda P]

Oh my, how did I miss this frisky read. Such luverly thoughts wrapped in bliss'd surrender. I love the rhythm and sentiment of this Arzel, excellent my nutter friend. ;-)

[Blue]

Mothernutter, I actually remembered you when I wrote this down. The title "mutual surrender" sounds like you, or so I think. I just didn't put apostrophes in my poem. Haha. Thank you!

[Frieda P]

Ha that's cute hon...I've written a few 'surrenders' myself, but I really like the originality of yours, 'geometry' who knew I'd ever enjoy reading that word! You're a clever nutter truly!

[Blue]

Thanks, mothernutter. I remember you hate Math. :)

[Frieda P]

Ha you threw that one in there on purpose eh? ;-P

[Blue]

Oh, was I obvious? :P

[Frieda P]

Ha you can't help yourself, you're a nutter! haha ;-)

[Dhaye]

You know, you write more mature pieces bravely...than any other adult people here. I admire you for that. Maybe I'll try to make one. LOL
This is sensual but beautiful. Keep it up, sis!

[Blue]

Wow. That's quite a compliment! And sure, Ate... Keep me updated it you have already published a "mature" poem. :) Thank you as always!

[Dhaye]

You're welcome. =)

[Dhaye]

Ayun...I have posted one...just a simple one. I don't know if it will sound really mature...parang pa-sweet lang din. LOL

[Blue]

Haha. I'll check it, Ate. :)

[Blue]

But I really need to go home na so bukas ko na lang babasahin, Ate. Good night po!

[Dhaye]

Good night, baby!

[Baby Ricochet]

My it's getting hot up in here.

[Blue]

Must be global warming. :) Thanks, BR!

[Tina Louise UK]

Beautiful sensual read hun...really enjoyed :) x

[Blue]

Thank you, Tia!

[...]

very amazing connections of words. i feel lot of love and passion. also understaning and compassion. i love it

[Blue]

Thank you so much, Martin! :)