Oh, woman!

to all women concerned

Glorious descendant of Eve.

Creature shaped after Adam.

Blessed with beauty.

Blessed with heart.

What insult!

What woe to self you inflict!

Degrading.

Detestable.

Inhuman.

Sacred flesh

you now cheaply expose,

feasted upon

by eyes void of chastity.

Unlawful acts

you shamelessly conduct

to satiate

carnal pleasures

to gain

fleeting approval of men.

Take caution.

Gain wisdom.

Redeem your honor!

Reviews

[Antoñyo]

This would make a good contest challenge .... or in other words, somebody write a "Oh, Man!" before I do!
...because along with expressions of pure in all its forms, this is my favorite type of writing; the extremely necessary works of art that should spreads wings and fly way beyond these cafe walls.
Powerful and piercing piece,
Thanks!

[Blue]

Thank you so much, Antonyo. Your review cheered me up!

[Blue]

I'm looking forward to reading your "Oh, Man". :)

[Antoñyo]

Aw, I'm glad it cheered you up...not sure I could do that poem proper justice. :-).

[Madalyn Beck]

It is truly sad how the world has turned out mistake lust for love. This is a good poem that depicts our human flaws. Great job! :)

[Blue]

Thank you so much, Madalyn!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

okay everybody out of the Garden!

we are going to start over...where are those fig leaves?

it seems today that love means so much less...everything is just physical and chaotic...and the emotion got left with the tree of knowledge back in the garden.

i think as poets getting out of our comfort zone is a good risk to take.

and this poem should make us uncomfortable..i don't think you are saying everyone is like this...but some do fit the bill.

[Blue]

I'm thankful that you didn't judge me for being quite a puritan in this one, Jacob. You really know how to READ. I love this review.

[Dayran]

Preaching from the pulpit ... distant and isolated from the world where people play and live.

[Blue]

True words, Dayran! You are really good at reading between the lines!

[gabrielle]

Some girls think that by showing off their “assets” they could catch the attention of well..boys.. A lady/woman, however, knows better. =)

[Blue]

You know better, too. Haha. Thanks, Gab!

[Baby Ricochet]

Hey I used to date her .................

[Blue]

Haha. Thanks for admitting that one, BR.

[Chaz Hemsworth]

quite deep. Men are a shame these days. I can't really quite relate on a personal level with the poem, but I definitely see what you mean. The shortness and bluntness is a slight detractor as it seems like you are a wise sage (go grasshopper. Seek destiny. Fight the Evil. Gain your honor) over an eloquent speaker.

[Nusquam Esse]

It is a fallacy to assume that Men are a shame 'these days'. Misogyny has existed in many cultures for thousands of years, it is no recent trend; in fact, a general trend away from this is the current state of many societies. In my personal experience, the problems pointed out here are not even exclusively mens' fault, but rather a mutually held issue; and this poem doesn't even focus on the behavior of men, but rather on women holding themselves to a higher standard. If you look around you, you will notice that there are plenty of men who do not behave as enablers for this form of behavior, and who hold themselves with dignity. Likewise, you will find women who are confident in themselves, and will not compromise their dignity for 'the fleeting approval'. However, both genders have their large numbers of people who do not behave with dignity. The man who doesn't even attempt to keep his sex drive in check, and the women who are so desperate for validation that they are willing to w***e themselves out to these men. (I know a disturbingly large number of women who behave this way, enough that I KNOW it is absurd to blame the issue on men exclusively.) Never take an issue like this, and label it as an issue with a gender, it doesn't matter which side you take, it is still sexist behavior which will further propagate the issue (in holding men exclusively accountable, you are failing to prompt women to act with personal dignity, which does not help.)

[Nusquam Esse]

And don't take what I said personal, I am just trying to point out that 'self-shaming' your own demographic is at best patronizing. If you personally have the problem, of behaving shamefully... then work on it, and feel free to say as much. But it is in poor taste to take a whole group of people, and hold them all down to try and come across as being sympathetic to a cause which you do not fully understand (and to be fair, I don't think many people do). It quickly becomes passive-aggressive behavior, which is not healthy by any means... ;)

[Blue]

Thank you so much, Chaz, for sharing your inisights! :)

[Blue]

*insights...

[Nusquam Esse]

Really wish I could adore this like I do most of your poems, but it just isn't doing it. I thought about it for a while, debating what it was, and if I couldn't figure it out, if I should even bother to post here. I think ultimately the problem is that this is a short poem, which uses lots of small stanzas, yet the words don't seem to carry enough weight for how brief they are. When writing such short lines, they have to cut and pierce... and I just didn't feel it from most of them. I did however, really like "to gain fleeting approval of men.", your usage of fleeting really did it for me. I think it is just word choice problem, like a single word in each line which prevents it from reaching its full potential. Now as for the meaning, it is a good one. But it is not exactly a unique one, so the quality of the writing and imagery is even more important. I have read many poems on the subject, which carried more power, so this just plain and simply doesn't stand out as much. You either stand out with unique themes, or with exceptional writing and unique descriptions. Don't take my impressions personally though, as I said, I really like your poetry as a whole. Really wish I could pinpoint the exact reason that this doesn't resonate with me. :( I also regret that I couldn't leave glowing praise, but well... at least you know that when I praise something, I do actually mean it. I decided that to not leave my true impressions, and leaving you with just a circle-jerk of praise... it would somehow be... disingenuous.

[Blue]

Nusquam, it really helps to receive this kind of criticism--brutally honest and unapologetically straight to the point. I'm not comfortable with this poem either. It deviates from my usual style and it has a "condemning" voice which frightens me as well. Haha. I'm honored that you really take time to read my poems and fathom what's between the lines. Thank you, too, for being fearless in voicing out your opinion especially with Chaz Hemsworth.

[Saddam]

A deep message in your poem. Women are most respectful than anyone even god. It is tell that where wmen have respect where god lives, but some shameful act every where is happend. Anybody may change their mind for.
Very rare and dare kind of poem.

[Blue]

Thank you so much, Ssadd!