Chapter 1

The beginning of the story Return to BakeryLand

Chapter 1

WE begin this story with our intrepid hero, King Dough of BakeryLand, wise and handsome, languishing away on the island of none other than DevilsFood herself. 

You see, DevilsFood was a very lonely, lovely woman with raven black hair and perpetually tan skin.  She looked as delicious as the actual Devils Food Cake.  In fact she had often been mistaken as a piece of the cake itself. 

When King Dough landed on her isolated island shores, she had promised him a way home to BakeryLand, but only if she could go with him.  She ultimately didn’t want to leave her island, and she most certainly didn’t want King Dough to leave.  She though that her plan would be a good way to convince him to stay for a long, long time.

And for a while, it worked.  King Dough stayed on the lone island for over four years.  His auburn hair had dulled to a golden sheen, and his icy cold blue eyes had grown to a blue gray.  His once muscular physique had become truly doughy �" mushy and pliable �" resembling his previously glorious name. 

Good King Dough realized, during one of the long years that DevilsFood was keeping him on the island, that he was never to return to BakeryLand.  He also recognized that she had intended this from the beginning.  He knew that he would have to take decisive action.  Through his cunning wit and sense of humor, he would have to trick DevilsFood into letting him go home.

One day while the near-blinding sun was out, and DevilsFood was working on her naturally perfect tan, King Dough approached her and said, “DevilsFood, I am about to make you an offer that you absolutely can’t, and shouldn’t, refuse.  I will slay the despicable Dragon of Dental Hygiene that has been taking away the peace and serenity of this beautiful island.  In exchange for my daring act of bravery, you must allow me to return to the rolling hills of frosting, which wander throughout my delightful home, BakeryLand. 

DevilsFood dramatically paused, and retorted, “Oh my poor King Dough!  The sun must be getting through your lustrous hair and changing your way of thinking.  You know I can’t allow you to do that!  The fearsome dragon would be far too powerful for you.  It asks a riddle of anyone who would dare to come near it �" if you can’t answer the riddle, it will destroy you.  And even if you were to answer the confusingly complex riddle, you could not slay him �" not with common weapons anyway.  He can only be slain by the greatest weapon of all �" AngelCake’s cherished Rolling Pin of Doom!

“And after you have slain him, and I have released you, who would spread the tale of your success to all the foreign lands?  It is only you and I on this edge of the island, and the golden Butterscotch on the other end.  There is no one else.  If you were to slay the Giant Dragon and I were to allow you to leave, I would be so lonely without you, that I would just melt into nothingness!” she finished, punctuating the end of the sentence with a cry.

King Dough pondered the problem brought up by DevilsFood for a few minutes �" when he had come up with his plan, he gave a devilish reply, “DevilsFood, my dear, it’s most important that I display my valor and cunning to both you and all the great gods of BakeryLand.  All the chefs in BakeryLand tell of my importance to the gods �" perhaps it’s time that I remind them of that importance.”

DevilsFood acknowledged that she probably wouldn’t be able to change King Dough’s mind, but she had to try her best to do something.  So she tried to confuse him by saying, “You say you will go home when you have slain the dragon; how will you get there?  There are no boats here.  Even if there were boats, you have angered Piefill, the generous and great god of pie fillings.  Or have you so easily forgotten the misfortune which brought you to my island?” her eyes filling with delight at her possible victory.

King Dough quickly countered, asking, “I could easily build a boat with my prowess and knowledge from the trees that surround your gentle abode.  But I don’t understand �" how have I angered Piefill?”

“Don’t you remember?” DevilsFood questioned.  “You destroyed and ate the Giant Ham, which was one of Piefill’s favored followers.  There is no way, save the will of PieLord, that Piefill would let you have safe passage home.

“And the final question,” as she took a deep breath and continued, “would I, PieLord permitting, be able to at long last be able to leave this paradise island, or must I stay here, forever lonely, until I go down to the Land of No Taste, where everything is bland and unexciting?”

King Dough reiterated a promise that he made when he first came to the lonely island so many years ago: “Of course you would be welcome in BakeryLand and at my home.

“As soon as we arrive there,” his eyes lighting up as he began to think about BakeryLand, “we would have a great and glorious banquet; Queen Cupcake would be there, as well as Prince Crumb, my son.  We would have a delicious and bountiful feast: strawberry pound cake, fruit and cream pies, chocolate and coffee crumb cakes, and my favorite coconut cream cake!  Oh, how I wish I could see my family again!  How happy we all would be!” he cried out, falling to his knees in the rich golden sand.

DevilsFood’s rich brown eyes began to well up with tears as she heard the distraught man’s cries.  “Very well, my King Dough.  Even though it goes against my every wish to keep you here, I will let you destroy the despicable Dragon of Dental Hygiene for me.  However, you will need some followers to carry your equipment on your journey to find the mystical Rolling Pin of Doom and then to take your tale far and wide to all nations when you have destroyed the despicable Dragon.  Go to Butterscotch the Golden on the other end of the island.  She will be able to help lead you to a guide, I hope.  Go with the blessing of the pies.”