Memories of you

Memories of you

A Poem by Daz

Sunsets and road trips to the beach
Intimate conversations with candlelight 
These memories a life time ago  
A union witnessed by nightly stars 
Promises made in the heat of the moment, 
while drinking wine straight from the bottle 
Just know you have a place In my heart 
Nothing is ever guaranteed 
Except death 
But you did bring out the best in me

© 2024 Daz


Author's Note

Daz
The photos here are some I took on a visit to Galveston Beach, Texas.

My Review

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Featured Review

This is a nice expression of all the memories associated with someone that's missed. Your details feel realistic, but also there are some ideas that have been written about a million times, such as "nightly stars" & "heat of the moment" -- I try to find original ways to say these time-worn phrases. Show me these stars, are they sparkling stars? That conveys so much more than "nightly" stars (of course, they come out nightly! here's where we, as writers, need to pick words that convey more vivid meaning). Thanks for accepting my critique . . . only meant to keep in mind for future writing . . . your poem here is well-stated without changes.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Daz

7 Years Ago

Thanks for the suggestions barleygirl. I will keep that in mind.



Reviews

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mou
a very soothing piece that recalls all those simple fine days..it's true that one of those casual moments is the best tool while capturing the past..I love it
mou.

Posted 6 Years Ago


You pen such a tender and loving reminiscence here. Vivid imagery of beautiful days and nights spent together..you perfectly set the stage with sea, sun and candlelight and wine sipped and promises made. Sometimes the most precious things are those that we only had - for a minute. I love the last four lines- great and fitting ending. Bravo!

Posted 7 Years Ago


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...
Story in few lines of your words. Joy with bitter end. Feeling of happiness cause this all what matter. Well done dear poet.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Daz

7 Years Ago

Thank you!
This is a nice expression of all the memories associated with someone that's missed. Your details feel realistic, but also there are some ideas that have been written about a million times, such as "nightly stars" & "heat of the moment" -- I try to find original ways to say these time-worn phrases. Show me these stars, are they sparkling stars? That conveys so much more than "nightly" stars (of course, they come out nightly! here's where we, as writers, need to pick words that convey more vivid meaning). Thanks for accepting my critique . . . only meant to keep in mind for future writing . . . your poem here is well-stated without changes.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Daz

7 Years Ago

Thanks for the suggestions barleygirl. I will keep that in mind.

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2840 Views
4 Reviews
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Added on April 10, 2017
Last Updated on January 9, 2024

Author

Daz
Daz

Houston , TX



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