No Returns, Only Exchanges

First post, not sure how this goes. This is about not feeling comfortable in your own skin and trying to cope with life and death through substance use. The cycle it all.

This is morning? I thought we had a deal.

This is awakening. This is… I don’t feel good.  

“Hello? Yes. I would like to make a return, this doesn’t fit right.”

Strict policy. No returns, only exchanges.

F**k. Okay, then.

I’ll make a change. An ex-change. Another transaction.

Let’s see what this chemical reaction will mutate me into this time.

Tiny dragon wading in the water. I will drink you alive!  

Except dragons breathe, too.

The fire burns.

That’s different.  

Everyone likes this, they are all gathered around this watering hole. I like it, too.

Yeah, yeah, that’s what I say. I agree.

This is socializing.

“Hello? Yes. I would like to make a return, this doesn’t fit right.”

Strict policy. No returns, only exchanges.

Okay, then I’ll have another.

I am forming healthy, mutual relationships with those around me.

CHEERS.

This is great. But I really need to get back to getting rid of all this. It doesn’t fit right and the alterations department says they can't fix it. Please take it back, nobody will accept this used skin.

Strict policy. No returns, only exchanges.

Well then, I’ll give you this pain if you give me that one. That’s a deal!

Here’s another!

This one is for… you? Sure. I’ll agree.

I am building foundations that last a lifetime.

It’s getting difficult, you see, to see. My legs are starting to feel wobbly and I’m not exactly in control of where I’m going.

I feel a little better now.

My stomach hurts, too. I don’t think I can precisely control this nausea. If I throw up here, will you still be my friend?

There are no friends in reptilian transformations.

But you feel that now? That’s different, right?

I feel a little better now.

Thanks.

This one is for… you, dead. Insert name. 

The watering hole is vacating. Nobody likes remembering the lucky ones.

I am crying. It should have been me!

Strict policy. No returns, only exchanges.

I am going to lay down here.

The whole world spins. Every organ fighting every organ. 

Every dragon for itself.

I feel better now. 

Author's Note

What do you think? It's a little rough, first post. Any comments are welcomed.

Reviews

[Annette Pisano-Higley]

Very profound poem, describing the plight of someone who is not able to be peaceful in themselves without using substances. Great use realistic conversation and repetition of "Strict policy. No returns. Only exchanges." to introduce the wheeling-dealing that is necessary to cope with each situation to get relief. Good work- Effective and relevant!

[golden]

Thank you! I'm glad that the struggle, the coping, was able to be communicated.

[Tony Jordan]

Amazing write. I think you'll be a super star. Such talent!

[golden]

Thank you! I'm not sure about "super star", but, thank you reading!

[Gee]

He said that to me so I jacked my nob on in and went full time poet. I'm now living in a wheely bin with 3 rats and one eyed dog.....and they all complain about the way that I smell !!

[Gee]

Job in not my nob on......
I am a knob !!

[Tony Jordan]

Freudian slip Gee? lmao
Hey, everybody seems to be getting told they are the next Wordsworth or Lord Byron or Plath, I thought I'd join in and tell them that too. lmao...

You're a good egg - not a nob hahah

[golden]

I'm a golden egg then! Haha

[Tony Jordan]

I like my eggs scrambled - hahah

[Gee]

I like too fertilise....

[Gee]

I like to.....ach, wassa point...

[Tony Jordan]

you dont know what you like mate
hahah :))

[golden]

I like to get rid of 1 every month! BAH!

[Tony Jordan]

haha - when auntie erma visits ?

[Tony Jordan]

I mean auntie Irma - sheesh my keyboard has Gee-itis.

[Gee]

Ughhhhh, I like to give the shedee a wide birth for fear of saying something that might result in me losing my life.

[Tony Jordan]

Aye right Gee. You reviewed 'The Time Of The Month' recently - lol - no use denying it. We are all for the chop ! haha Good afternoon mo chara. :D

[Gee]

Indeed, have had the snip, the fella thought I was cold, " shall I put the heating on" didn't dare tell him that my button mushroom was at full tilt..
How the land of the Elfin gids

[Gee]

Kin ell ...Gods

[Gee]

I've just read that back, jaysus, best check the mirror for a sagging eye....

[Tony Jordan]

Sorry I'm so like ya Gee.
:)

[Gee]

Not your post mate, mine...

[Tony Jordan]

I was talking about the button shroom's - ditto like... lol