Pain

For two long years I trained relentlessly
For two long years I shed sweat, pain, blood and tears
For two long years I suffered yet grew strong
For two long years, I failed

I once read, "Ireland is a place full of Magnificent failures"
Aye, tis true
Let me explain

At first I was diseased
Diseased with alcoholism and chain smoking
I was ridden with a broken heart and soul that was but shaking without end
I was lost, I came to a crossroads,chose a direction and followed

The first year was hard,
I battled conditions that made me sick, sore, that shook me to my very core
I met immovable objects, yet I was beyond an unstoppable force
Aye, for I am dangerous when I had a goal
I was danger incarnate

That first year showed me something
It showed me a part of that was lost
Lost in the years of haziness
The haze was intoxication
Intoxication but alcohol

And so was past, the first year
The second year came and started oh so well
I was but skin and bone and yet the lungs of a giant
For many a moon I trained and grew big and strong
For those moons spent, were moons that stemmed wisdom into the fibres of my being

In the year that followed so too did death
Yet again I dodged deaths grip
I have wondered, why have I not died in situations that would have killed another?
An athiest I am yet I wonder?
"Sister, do you watch over me, are you my own personal guardian Angel?"

For two long months I learned to walk again, I learned to run again.
They said id never run properly again, they said id be in too much pain
They said I couldnt do it.
Yet a summons, A call of duty appeared.
"Son you have 2 months to learn to walk and run." said my dad

Aye he knew my answer for I did not utter it aloud
I passed my pshyical, when they said I couldnt.
I was but a shadow of my former physical self,
Yet my mind was immortal, a god in its own right

My determination knew no end, it had no limit and no bounds
They no nought of what they lost
"You are on a waiting list" they said
"F**k you" says I.

Life grew tougher then, tougher then ever.
For I know not my path, nor my goals nor my dreams
Have I forgotten that of which once filled me with power?
Has my determination retreated into the shadow abysal depths of my heart and soul?
I am lost, borderline on giving up.
Yet it is not in my nature to give up.

I was told "You have a unique gift, you know that."
"what do you mean?" I asked stupidly.
My friend smiled "You never ever give up." he walked away.

For I will fight to my very last breath
Even in death I will fight
For I will sacrifice my own soul before I give in
I would erase my own existance from the spirals of the universe before I surrendered

Yet where am I now?
But ridden with pain.

Author's Note

This is me trying to air out the feelings that have been bottled up for so long there a part of me and always will be.

its me trying to fight through the hardships of life which consume me at the moment.

Reviews

[Melody Telleria]

Oh this was just wonderful, Keith! I loved the feelings that you released, what a great story you told about yourself in poetry form. You are most definitely facing hardships, I sense that they are like a monsters shadow looming over you.

So you had to learn to walk again and run again? You were in some sort of accident? Bravo to you for overcoming the odds (=

Those last two lines really tugged at my heart. I'm sorry that the pain runs deep.

[abraxus89]

Ya, I completely tore like 90% of the ligaments in my ankle, anyone that has had similar ankle injuries will know what I did in 2 months, aka running the mile and a half in 10 minutes 20 is really something else.

Well ive decided I am going to travel within europe so im currently chatting to some friends.

Lets hope this will work out haha!

thanks for reading