The Murderer

A murderer turns psychotic due to guilt and kills himself. Partly based on the character William Sikes in Oliver Twist

'Tis oft that guilt, like awful thunder

Does seek such fearful company,

That splits his hardened heart asunder

And reeks such tearful symphony.

 

Yon starry eye that glazed like ember,

That thought it wrought such bravery,

Now dead and hazy, must remember

Such doom as brings much reverie.

 

With worsted quilt and buxom bosom

Yon robin rings felicity;

In yonder field the killer, gruesome,

Now stares with grim intensity.

 

"Now hark!" he thinks he hears yon robin

"For this is your last lullaby";

And with his gun his temples throbbing,

He bids the world a vile goodbye.

Reviews

[DeliriousCerises]

First one, kudos to you and your use of archaic language, it something that is not often seen used correctly, and smoothly, in a way that doesn't seemed forced, but natural. The first thing that came to mind when I read this was The Tell-Tale Heart, by Edgar Allan Poe. The next thing that came to mind, is the quote "Revenge is sweeter than life itself. So think fools." I just imagine this man was taking revenge, only to realize it wasn't worth it. Overall, this is a wonderful poem, I enjoy poems that tells stories, even if they're short ones. Good job.

[Hayley]

Yay another poem that's not-so-modern! :)
I love it, excellent job with the language (even I know how hard it is to keep that going and still make it meaningful). I like the murderer's last thoughts connected with the robin, the delicate robin that is so contradictory.
Honestly, wonderful job!

[Augustus]

What a pleasure it is to read you after a long long time Abdul! This one reminds me of days long past, when I used to dive into the Golden Treasury and glide over lines very similar to these. While your poetry is always reminiscent of the romantic poets, I sense this one to be deliberately archaic. Perhaps it is because it was inspired by a character from an old novel. Perhaps not. I like the robin metaphor. It adds delicacy to counter the otherwise sinister tone of the verse. I like the euphemism in the last stanza as well.
Overall, I found this to be a solid free-flowing piece of work, though not as magical as some of your others. I had to say that. You brought it upon yourself. Since you're accustomed to climbing Mt. Everest regularly, people are hardly going to applaud you for scaling Mt. Kanchenjunga! Keep writing and keep in touch!

[Dinesh Sairam]

The first stanza seemed a bit force. But then, the following stanzas are not so much. You are notoriously (!) famous for writing on new and genuine themes (What the mind told the heart, Grenade on a rain drop, Remnants of tomorrow etc) and this is no different.

My favorite stanza is

Yon starry eye that glazed like ember,
That thought it wrought such bravery,
Now dead and hazy, must remember
Such doom as brings much reverie.

Oddly, and I would normally oppose such vehement usage of archaic language, such language adds to the effect of the poem. Great write, and whatever you thought of achieving through this poem, is most possibly achieved.

Keep writing.