Raining Love - an etheree

The poetry form, Etheree, consists of 10 lines of 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 syllables.

Drops
Of rain
Don't restrain
Their sweet refrain.
A heavenly grain
Falls on her lovely frame.
I try in vain to contain
This love that hits me unashamed.
The petals crave for her touch - Of rain -
I see her symphony come unrestrained.

Author's Note

The rhyme wasn't necessary. Etherees don't have end rhymes, but I decided to add some to see how the end product is. Please do tell me if I can improve this.

Written on 10/14/09

Reviews

[C.T. Bailey]

Oh man...this is fantastic! The addition of rhyme worked out nicely (and I like that you kept the same rhyme throughout...that just seems to fit well for an Etheree). I don't think I'd change a thing. Line 9 is so strong....I love it. This is a gem. Well done!

[Wicahpi]

I think is fine as it is written.
Rain, put in this context is wonderfully refreshing!
Well written. I do not mind the rhyme...

[Marie Harrison]

This was extrodinary. I love the rhyme in this poem. It definately makes it more interesting. The imagery and tenderness of the expression is remarkable.

[faryn wolff]

This is lovely! I’ve never read an etheree before and this was the perfect introduction to one. It’s almost direct without restricting honesty and charming diction. I think these lines accentuate the emotion in the poem: “ I try in vain to contain/ This love that hits me unashamed.” Superb write!

[LittleMadGirl]

This is wonderful ... How it all gets so intense in the end and the rhyming completes the flow so perfecly
wich I could rat .. you'd get 100% =)

[Rose Tyler]

I quite enjoyed reading this and think it is very well written.
This is the first I've read an Etheree and think it's very interesting.
Good job!