Breathe My Name

Breathe my name with the breeze that rustles

Through the leaves and part your velvet-touched

Lips, that they may take my own rough ones

To a place as near bliss insomuch

That I can smell the melting morning dew

On your frosted hazel eyes through

Your lips. Let me uncloak you with

Trembling hands, and bid adieu

To whatever sadness resided in our hearts,

Through your bosom and its plaintive song,

So supple and melodious, falling

Only on ears to which it belongs.

I've lost myself in you beyond recovery;

Call on me and you will find me true,

If God wills, as the answer to

This most exquisite question - you.

Reviews

[Wuji]

The combination of intimacy and technique in this piece is exceptional. Your romantic lyrical quality is more natural than the majority of Keat-Shelley impersonates and you manage to make the most gushy sentiments believable and easily nestling side by side in a romantic whole. I rate this quite high, compared to any poem out there...

[Robert Haigh]

This comes across as a sincere declaration of love, rendered in poetic terms, with good use of language! I like it very much!

[LazerRays]

such a sweet descriptive poem :) i love the way it tingles your senses and makes the whole thing seem so realistic. really great!
-sarah (or saree)

[Abdul Aziz]

Thank you very much!

[Michael Atherton]

This is so beautiful. Wish I had more details to back up my statement, but seeing as this truly affected me, I think the first sentence speaks for itself.

[Gleb Zavlanov]

A very lovely poem. Such a fine melody and beautiful imagery, mixed with blazing passion yet a gentle tone. Excellent work!

[Abdul Aziz]

Thank you!

[Augustus]

Aaah vintage Abdul. I really envy you for the way you write about romance. I think you are a master on the theme of love. What makes it even more special is that there are very few in this world who understand structured verse the way you do, and fewer still who can render it as beautifully. Very interesting use of enjambments here. As usual, you lavishly throw around poetic gems in your stanzas: "breathe my name", "frosted hazel" were my favourites. The third stanza is beautiful in its conception, and its last line: "Only on ears to which it belongs" speaks out so eloquently. The truly gorgeous touch, though, was the very last line of the poem: "This most exquisite question - you". So poetic, so romantic! Sublime! Brilliant! I'm so happy I read this, Abdul! Thanks for sharing. And a belated happy Eid to you!

[Abdul Aziz]

I don't know what to say! Thank you very much for such high praise!

[Augustus]

You're welcome. You deserve the praise.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

wow what a love poem..."the most exquisite question...you"

beautiful piece.

[Abdul Aziz]

I am humbled that you like this poem, Jacob :)

[Lilly]

Another piece that is so beautiful!
Really love the whole thing but the first and last stanzas are really quite breathtaking.

Lovely poem!

[Abdul Aziz]

Thank you very much for liking my poem! :)