14. Nice Try

Ian vs Jonathon. Who will win?

Ian and Emily sat quietly in their chairs against the wall. Ian casually glanced around the office. The initial shock of being kidnapped had worn off. Even Emily had relaxed to a degree. Indeed, she was even getting a little fidgety.

Jonathon was sitting at the desk next to them intently studying the display on his lap top. Stefanie had stepped out of the office and Ian had no idea when she would be back. He began to ponder the idea of an escape attempt. He started sizing Jonathon up. They were both about the same size and age. Jonathon was fit and lean, but so was Ian. He and Chrissy jogged and worked out together on a regular basis.

But there was a subtle aura of danger around Jonathon. Ian imagined he probably knew some good fight moves. He was probably even familiar with some of the martial arts. In a one-on-one fight with him, Ian had little doubt which of them would win... and which would lose.

Still, there was something to be said for the element of surprise. If he was quick enough, he could snatch the fist sized rock on the desk that Jonathon was using as a paper-weight, crack him on the head with it and take his gun. It was a foolhardy idea, especially with Emily next to him. But he felt that he had to do something. He glanced at her. She looked back at him with worry in her eyes. Did she guess what he was thinking? He looked back at Jonathon who seemed entirely engrossed in his computer.

He decided to act.

He felt his pulse quicken. A drop of sweat ran down the small of his back under his shirt as he started to lean toward the desk... ever... so... slowly.

“Don't make me tie you up, Ian,” said Jonathon casually without looking up from his lap top, “It cramps the shoulders and cuts off the circulation to your hands.”

Ian froze. Then he slumped his shoulders and sat back in his chair again. He looked at Emily. She looked back at him with a proud gleam in her eyes. He sighed. His escape attempt had been stopped almost before it started. But at least he tried. He knew he wasn't a coward in his daughter's eyes.

Author's Note

Suggestions and constructive criticisms are always welcome.

Reviews

[C. Rose]

https://diigo.com/020jmk
I'm trying a new kind of reviewing. The above link shows my annotations of this chapter.
Green highlighting means I liked it.
... and in this chapter I didn't notice any problems so I didn't use other colors.

Let me know if you prefer diigo reviews or normal reviews.

[SpeedyHobbit Armstrong]

Wow, Jonathan really is very observant. Scary. I like how you showed insight into his thoughts and feelings. I wish this chapter were a little bit longer- trying to imagine thoughts be might be having. At least there is hope in Chrissy! You definitely have a similar style to mine in Fallen Ones where there isn't just one main character

[Craig2591]

Another commenter also suggested that I make this chapter longer, building up a lot more tension only to have Jonathon let Ian know he is fully aware of what he is up to. If I ever do a rewrite I will definitely consider your suggestion. Thank you for continuing to read.

[Tina Kline]

Good chapter. I'm glad Ian got some positive feedback from Emily for at least being willing to try and create an escape for them. Perhaps Chrissy is on her way even now to save the day....

[Craig2591]

Thank you.

[John Lauterbach]

I like it. I'd like to see Ian get a little further along in his escape attempt, build some tension that he might actually do it - then have Jonathon deliver his line to Ian in his awkward getting-out-of-a-chair position.

[Craig2591]

Thanks for the suggestions and continuing to read.