Mother Dearest

“Hey.

Look at me.

You have to stop this.

You have to stop peering into every reflective surface you see and tearing yourself into the most minuscule strips of printer paper. You are not printer paper, you are papyrus; so strong and tough that even the scribes don’t know how to write on you.

You are not on a stage, there is no spotlight. People are not ridiculing your every step, your every word.

So why are you?

And listen, you should get over him. No, you need to.

You may feel like he’s sitting on the perch of your soul, waiting for you intently to make a second move,

But stand still. Don’t lift a finger.

Babe, looking into the mirror is a feat. Love? You really think you can handle love? You’re crazy.

Because I already know what’s gonna happen. I know you too well.

You’re going to place your heart into this boy’s hands, you’re going to cling to him like Tarzan and his swinging jungle vines and guess what?

He’s gonna trip and then BOOM. Your heart plummets out of his hands and you crash face-first into the nearest tree.

You’re gonna give him everything and then he’s just gonna turn and walk the other way and you’ll be left with nothing. Everything you’ve worked so hard to get back just turns to

Nothing.

You may trust him with every fiber of your being but I don’t. And I sure as Hell don’t trust you.

You need to let him go.

You need to let every silly scenario of love go because it’s not gonna save you.

Those books and movies are so misleading, don’t believe a word they say.

Love’s not gonna save you, kiddo.

Only you are.

And I swear to God, one day you’ll stop clinging to every fading star, every false hope and you’ll start believing in yourself.

Go dance in the grass, sunshine. You’ve never been a kid. You’ve loved so deeply from the day you were born and it’s torn you apart.

Go put on your favorite sun dress and spin until you fall down and laugh until your lungs ache.

Spin until you’ve forgotten about every person you’ve ever cared about and you’ve been transported to a world where you’ve found the fire that was once your soul.

And once you’ve found it,

Love it.

Love yourself.

Love yourself so immensely, so powerfully, so irreversibly good,

That the entire universe quivers in your presence.”