Todays men.....Exposed!

A rant, turned story for WC standards, about the sorry state that todays men seem to be in.

What happened to the days of old, when men were men, and boys were boys? What happened to the days when honor, chivalry, and respect lived? Today, those days seem gone to me. True I am an idealist, with hopes and dreams that all people do not seriously desire to be cruel, dishonest, or disrespectful, but I’m starting to see things a little more as they are.... I say a little more because I’m still hoping, naively, that these men I see are just part of some bad dream and I will soon awake.

 

These thoughts are inspired and encouraged by men today, or should I say little boys of today. I am not talking of the few I know who are true men, but of the many others I’ve met over the last year who seem to think that their value is in their pants and the size of their dick. However, I will only mention three incidences of this strange mentality that seems to be sweeping mankind.

 

First, a man who I turned down for sex but stayed a part of my life due to a friendship and a "vision." Months after the original turn down he’s telling me how if he ever gets horny, after moving into the area, I’m always there and how I even like a certain position..... True, but...no. After I explain that I would not be interested in pursuing a relationship, be that BF/GF or friends with benefits, he drops it. Yay, no worries, all is well, heck he even seemed to agree with me. Nope! For a reason that he never fully explained, he tosses me out on my rear friendship and "vision" wise. I understand what this person SAYS is the reason, but problem is it’s all in his head and has no factual basis in reality. So why in fact did this person, less than 2 days after I tell him no way to sex or relationship, start a bunch of drama and later rumors that I was trying desperately to get in the sack with him? Maybe it’s cause he lied to me for a LONG time about the fact that he had a GF the whole time he was trying to get in my pants AND talking about moving up to where I lived and she started calling me seeking the truth. Ouh....bad situation to be in when you’re a player. The point I’m trying to make with this one is.....its NOT all about your dick!!! It’s NOT all about sex!!! Just because that’s all YOU think about isn’t what everyone else is thinking about!

 

Second, a sweet guy that I invited out to coffee once to get to know him better and see if we could be friends. We’re talking for a while about religion and racism and he suddenly starts telling me that he doesn’t do relationships and doesn’t have sex. I’m thinking o....k.... why is he telling me this? But of course I don’t ask, just blow it off as him being random and go back to the subject at hand cause it was really interesting. A few weeks later I finally realize what was going on. For some reason he thought that I invited him out to coffee at Denny’s because I had motivations other than friendship. Call me dense but I don’t see how coffee at Denny’s and talking about religion and racism add up to an interest in a relationship or sex. o.O

 

Third, another guy contacted me some time ago on My Space and he and I got to talking. Talked twice on the phone, met once at the local park with the kids, my two girls and his boy. Everything is cool, friendship wise, but then I distance myself for a while and not talk to him for over a month because I’m dealing with some BS and don’t believe in sharing negativity and talking to people about things they are not involved in. Today he texts me again, says he’s dropping his son off at his ex’s here in Tucumcari and wants to know if I wanna "get together." Am I dense or something? That to me sounds like hang out. I’ve already told him I have the girls with me 24/7 so what else could it mean? I ask, "yeah, where, when?" Not in the mood for chit chat I make it short. He responds, "I would really like to spend the night in a hotel with u." Shocked and annoyed I respond, "Um... No. Thanks for the offer but I think you’ve got the wrong idea about me and my intentions or aims. Good luck on yours. Bye." His one redemption from those actions....he left it at that and did not call me names for turning him down. He may have been thinking with his dick, but at least he was a gentleman about it.

 

Now that I have gone from worse case, to weird case, to best case of my argument, is anyone seeing where I’m coming from yet? Seriously, WTF is up with you guys? Can’t you be friends with someone w/o your true aim being to get in their pants or thinking that their true aim is to get in yours?! There’s a lot more to all of you than your dick or it’s size. You "men" are becoming like the females of the past that thought their only worth was how much a guy wanted to have sex with them. It’s pathetic. Now instead of saying this to females, we’re gonna need to start saying it to men.... work on your self-esteem and realize that you have more to offer than only what is between your legs. (I exclude 3 men from the above paragraph for they already are wonderful men who do not think with their dick, rather with their hearts, a sense of right and wrong, and most importantly honor.)

 

 

 

* After reading this now, about 2 weeks after I originally posted it, I would like to appologize for how frustrated and angry I sound in this piece.  I was frustrated and disappointed.  I realized later that the feeling of disappointment may not have come across as strongly as I was feeling thanks to various reviews, however that was my primary feeling.  Not disappointed that men would be viewing me as someone they really wanted to sleep with, I guess that should flatter me but really I don't care I just ignore them.  What I was disapointed about was how wonderful I think most men are, filled with amazing potential, but I feel they are limiting themselves to what goes on in their pants and hence suppressing all that god given beauty that they hold inside them.  That is why I am disappointed, no other reason.

Author's Note

I want input from men and women alike. This is an issue that's seriously starting to worry me.

Reviews

[Blindmikey]

If it's the problem you want revealed, look at the mentality of sudden gratification. And then look how the animalistic nature is abused and promoted so that the golden calf can shine ever brighter. Oh and how we amaze ourselves at it's polished lust. Push the button and feel the dopamine rush. But sick twisted joys somehow leave us with just the sick and twisted in the end. Until we do it again. And again. and again. Lines on the urinal we turn into an unknown master's slave. And unknown is what it likes to remain.

But the solution you've already seen. It lies in higher souls and wisdom's trees. The lesson no teacher taught you and no parent knew how, to listen to your heart and work its plow.

[Kelley Pascoe]

I can relate to some of the stuff you wrote in this (smile) I have kids myself and sometimes I JUST WANT A FRIEND TO HANG OUT WITH OR TO TALK TO right. Sex is not the answer to everything. I like it , but I don't let it rule my life. I got a great story for you to read sometime .
Kelley Frost

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

I really enjoyed your piece and even being a man i understand your frustration... times have changed and it seems many men think if a woman talks to him it is purely because they are interested in more then friendship. The days of chivalry are dead and gone and not just in the way we treat women but standing up and doing the right thing as well. It's certainly a different time and place thats for sure, even women have changed in there attitudes toward sex and society as well... in both cases not all are bad.

[ElJays Nicholas]

I think the problem is more the energies which are at play within each of us. I know this may sound bizarre to many people, but within each individual there are energies which are often in conflict with each other. One energy is Masculine, and the other energy is Feminine, kind of a Yin-Yang thing. When we don't have these energies balanced within ourselves, then these occurences tend to happen. And, I can attest to how overpowering the male energy is, not just in men, but in women as well. I have been used in the past by women with the same kind of Masculine dominance as you write about. So, I know where the anger and the frustration comes from. When the heart and the mind work together, then there is nothing that can come against us. But, how many of us neglect the heart? And, how many of us neglect the mind? Our own inner peace is what is at stake....

[bluessadmood]

that was so mature writing ,i like letting your reasoning go on and on ,so nicely putting a problem in a very romantic way ,and very exciting simple,you make your reader just want to read on and on ,i enjoyed it a lot really ,very nice,yes lots of men think that way ,its really stupid ,we are more than sexual human beings we are full of emotions ,thoughts ,not just a sex machine

[Blade & Blood (The ..]

It's the media... if anything goes wrong in this world, specifically in America (where the problems roam unsolved), we usually blame the media, politics, and religion, respectively. Because of the media, the "animal instinct" (lol) of (mostly) teenage boys is just kicking in as fear of the public fades.

I don't blame you, though. I hate how these "little boys" keep concentrating on what's in their pants... but the ones I keep meeting are teenagers anyways; stereotypically speaking, that's all they think about. They don't even give outcasts like me a chance in getting to know them. ;) Well done.

Ironically Yours, Blade and Blood

[Jason]

You know how men with small penises over compensate and have expensive cars? Well, i drive a Saturn...lol. There was a part in my life when all i was meeting was crazy CRAZY girls...then a wise man told me to look at what i am attracting..what was it that I was missing in my life that made me look blindly for love?..I know now that all woman are not crazy, just as all men are not just looking for sex.

[justjenn_2u]

I just have to say that if a woman wants to have sex all of the time, some men think they have the right to call her a w***e. But if a man wants to have sex all the time, that is all good. A tad contradictory. Nice point, glad you wrote this!

[Rain]

Men have always been the hunter. But, we became a civilized society, and we developed style..which includes character, decency, respect, honor, politness, caring. I loved this piece because it goes to the heart of what a man is. I think a sense of humor is sexier than any bulge in the pants. I think opening the door for a woman is style. I have a definition for class and style. Class is what you say when you're talking..style is what you say when you're walking..the way you carry yourself. I see a loss of character, in both men and women. Very interesting piece. Rain..

[V. K. Harris]

Nicely written, Though there are still a few good men out there and so I'm told there are a few good women out there. I as well am still searching for that soul that eludes me. :)

[David Salinger]

Most of my male friends think the size of their dick is the most important thing in the world. Do they ever get sex? Hells no. But they still think that they're bitchin' because they have a dangly thing between their legs.

My father told me that respect comes first before anything else. He told me that I should respect everyone: men, women, boys, girls, the young and the elderly...everyone.

Some fathers, though, weren't as wise as mine...