My Bisexual Love Story

Bisexuality. Love. Heartbreak. Pain. Moving on. Happiness.

My name's Allison. I'm 34.
I always knew I wasn't straight. I mean, like. I would look at guys and feel something and I would look at girls and feel the same. But the term 'bisexual' wasn't so commonly used back then, and I decided I was confused, my feelings were messed up, and then I went back to doing what society wanted me to do. But I never really ever got over it; I thought it would pass, but it never really did. I was attracted to girls too; and no amount of denying it to myself was enough to convince me that I was completely straight.
When I was 16, I was dating this guy named Brandon, and I liked him a lot, I truly did. We had been dating for like 3 weeks, when I met his 18 year old half-sister Kelsi. Kelsi was an open lesbian, and one particular day, it felt like we were just flirting with each other and stuff, and I couldn't believe it..I was actually enjoying it. Kelsi's presence made me feel excited - to the point I used to visit Brandon's house to see her.
And then one night, when Brandon was out getting stoned with his jock friends, Kelsi and I were sitting on the couch, talking, and then we kissed. From kissing, we moved to more..and then we had sex.
I felt terrible. I liked Brandon a lot, but I also liked Kelsi.
I stayed in bed for the next two days, and thought through everything. That was when I realised that I was attracted to both guys, and girls. There was no denying it anymore. I liked guys, but I also liked girls.
I first came out to Brandon because I felt like he deserved it. It was probably a bad decision, I don't know. I told him, and he seemed okay with it at first, and then I blurted out that I liked his sister, and then eventually it led to my telling him about our sleeping with each other. Brandon was mad. We had a huge fight, where he broke up with me, and he also shunned Kelsi.
It felt terrible, but I also felt relieved in a way.
Kelsi and I dated for one year and three months. Brandon still wasn't talking to either of us. Brandon's dad and mom, who was also Kelsi's mom, were surprised at first, but eventually they accepted it too. They just didn't know that I cheated on him with her, and the three of us wanted to keep it that way. It was an unspoken agreement.
It was amazing with Kelsi, she made me happy. We would spend hours talking without getting bored. I realised I loved her. I was in love with her.
I came out as bi to her too. She didn't have a problem with it.
But she took me to gay parades and stuff, and although people took me for a lesbian, when they got to know I was bi, they avoided me. Some were outright rude, this lesbian named Tía said I was actually a 'cowardly lesbian'. She openly said I was a liar and told me to just come out as gay. Those mean comments hurt..most people refused to take bisexuality seriously. Some people remarked that it didn't exist. They said bisexuals are either greedy straight people, or lesbians too afraid to come out.
People think being gay is hard. In some ways, being bisexual is actually harder. People do accept you're gay...while they just refuse to aceept that someone can be bi. They don't believe you, and they just think it's something you do to get attention, or something you find cool.
Kelsi and I broke up because she went away to study, and the long distance thing wasn't working for either of us. But I will forever remain grateful to her, she helped me explore my sexuality..she was the one who truly made me believe in who I was, and even helped me be proud of myself.
After Kelsi, I got into a number of small time affairs and relationships.
The next time I was seriously committed was with this guy named Cody I met through friends.  I was twenty two, he was twenty four.
We were in a fun, wild relationship. We were similar to each other, but we were also very different. We dated for two years and four months, when he proposed to me for marriage, the eve of my birthday. It was a very pretty, very grand event.
His family, or most of his family didn't like my "bisexuality". It was the same s**t all over again. One of his aunts actually asked, in this girly,  just between us tone, "You won't cheat on Cody, right?"
I said, "Of course I wouldn't."
"No, I meant with a woman."
We got married four months, after his proposal.
It was painful, really, some of his family didn't even turn up, the ones who did had forced smiles and lewd questions.
Even after the wedding, it was like that. Hushed comments whenever they saw me. Raised eyebrows whenever they saw me talking or laughing with another woman, whoever that might be.
And Cody was an amazing guy, but it would be wrong to say his family's mentality hadn't had an influence on him at all.
Our marriage lasted exactly a year. We had started arguing. I was never the type of person who could be oppressed, I stood up for myself and spoke the blunt, outright truth. He and his family didn't like that, and we called it quits.
After Cody, I was alone for six months, and those six months were necessary. I had fun on my own, visited places and discovered more avout myself than ever before. I was twenty six, bisexual, divorced, alone, and I was having the time of my life.
It was during this phase of my life that I discovered Kaitlyn. She was about a year younger than me. Bisexual. Out.
Kaitlyn made me feel free. She made me go heights, become a better, more independent version of myself.
She made me feel confident about who I was.
I fell in love with her, slowly, steadily and then irrevocably and all those other pretty twilight adverbs.
Kaitlyn and I dated for five years. During this time, we adopted a beautiful baby girl named Arielle.
And two years ago, I proposed to Kaitlyn. I was so sure this time.
This was the woman I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. This was the woman I wanted to raise my kids with. This was the woman I wanted to grow old and die with.
We got married on a beautiful autumn day. Our two year old baby Arielle sat on her grandma's lap in the front row.
As we said the vows, I was the happiest person on earth. And of course, she was, too.
Last year, we got a surrogate father and Kaitlyn delivered our second baby, beautiful baby boy Jacob.
Yes, Kaitlyn was a twilight fan.
Three year old Arielle is older sister to one year old Jacob, and Kaitlyn and I are the proudest, happiest moms on the planet.
I am happy. I am strong. I am confident.
I am with the woman I love, and two gorgeous babies, who by the way, call me Monah, and Kaitlyn Mannie.
All is right in the world.

Author's Note

Please leave a review. Be honest, I'd really like to know what yiu thought of it.

Reviews

[Kathrin S]

Are you really only 14? How do you know so much about this difficult topic, and are able to express it so well? I think that's pretty impressive.

At the same time, I feel like this piece was made to be read out loud - and it works really well for that If you're telling a story meant to be read, it's usually best to have action instead of a monologue, since you'll be able to grip your readers more that way.
Grammatically, it's well written, and I like the short sentences a lot.

Here are two notes I took while reading:
- "I had fun on my own, visited places and discovered more avout myself" - about.
- "Yes, Kaitlyn was a twilight fan." - why 'was' - she still is, right? Otherwise you make the reader think their relationship is over.

[Aatreyee Ghoshal]

Hi, thank you so much for reading and reviewing, I appreciate it a lot.
And yes, I am 14. And I am bisexual. I have..been through things, I have read things and seen things that have helped me put this story together.
Thank you for your suggestions. I will definitely keep them in mind.
Once again, thank you. :)

[April Showers]

I think sexuality is something that many struggle with and it can be very confusing.
I'm glad society's views are changing and people feel more comfortable in being open about who they are.

[Aatreyee Ghoshal]

I agree completely.
I am a proud member of the community, and I absolutely hope more people find the courage and strength to come out, and be proud and happy about who they are.