Pure happiness

What will you call a man 

who finds happiness in small things

not like other special beings

maybe he is able to be happy by himself

what more can be said about him

he does not borrow other's happiness

but produces the happiness himself

what quality of happiness will it be?

could anyone make a guess about it?

 the richness of such happiness sometimes confuses me

but its just simple happiness how can it be so complex

something must be wrong

i think i am wrong myself because i have done only complex things 

in my life

i never tried to be simple

to gain such simplicity

but that is my own mistake

because i tried to understand happiness

but it was to experience

the man who can produce happiness himself 

he may be a deity

oh ! i have again became complex 

he may be simply divine

who inspired me to write about him 

but do you think that does it matter that the one who produce such a happiness

is a man or a woman 

oh ! i have again became complex 

how he can be so simple

could you ever guess

?

he laughs 

he smiles

he dances

what other thing do a man wants?

-aatharva banaitkar.

Author's Note

what do you think about this?

Reviews

[Bushra Naqshbandi]

A very nice poem. Meaningful. Something everybody needs to realise.
A few grammatical mistakes though which I'd like to point out as they ruin the beautiful effect of the poem.

''he do not borrow other's happiness'' is grammatically incorrect. ''Do'' is used for plurals and here you're talking about a single person so it sould be ''he does not borrow.......''

''but who produces the happiness from within himself''
This does not match the previous verse. It sould be ''but produces the happiness......'' because in the previous sentence you've already disclosed who your subject is and by usin ''who'' again it appears as if you're talking about somebody other than the person mentioned in the previous line.

''could any would do guess about it?''
This is not the correct way of asking if anyone would make a guess about it. We write ''make a guess'' and not ''do guess'' and ''anyone'' or ''any of you'' is used not ''any'' alone. Hence, the sentence should be ''could anyone make a guess about it'' or ''could any of you make a guess about it''.

''but can one do , the richness of such happiness sometimes confuse me''
Since ''do guess'' is inappropriate, ''but can one do'' should be ''but can one guess?'' There should be a question mark also because a comma leads to a confusion in the meaning. Also when you talk about happiness you say happiness ''is'' and not happiness ''are'' hence it should be ''.........such happiness sometimes ''confuses'' me'' not ''confuse me.

oh ! i have got again complex
''Got again'' is sequentially wrong. It should be ''again got''. Infact, I think ''again become'' would be more appropriate than ''again got''.

how he can be such simple
You don't say ''such simple''. It's either ''such a simple person'' or ''so simple''.

he dance
what other thing do a man wants?
Again you're talking about the man so ''he dances'' not ''he dance'' and what other thing ''does a man ''want''.

Apart from these, the poem is very nice. The criticism is entirely constructive. I really liked the poem. :)

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

It's indeed about the experience, don't try to understand, feel and taste it. Happiness, you have to give and it will be given back. It's a two-way experience. Very well done, Aatharva. :) Rudi

[Confuser]

Dear Aathrava, I think it is absolutely BRILLIANT! I was so intrigued and entertained, laughing at the first slip back into complexity, proudly recognizing this before your writing acknowledged it. Pure happiness is the ultimate goal, No? Desires, ego...can ruin our harmony.
the man who can produce happiness himself
he may be a deity
oh ! i have again became complex
Thank you so much...made me smile, and think. Wonderful. Dale

[Jamestown]

Very well written piece, wisdom behind this message!
Thanks for sharing and b-blessed!

[B]

I love it

Very real

And wise

Nice job :)

[Aatharva Banaitkar]

Thank for your good remarks