Post-War Purgatory

Every day I wake it’s with the fire.

Burning

Searing

Incinerating

The very marrow of my bones,

Even the bones I’ve lost.

 

Every day I fight to survive the terror.

Frightening

Horrifying

Destroying

My ability to live quietly

Though my life is gone.

 

Every night I remember the day it began.

Shooting

Exploding

Screaming

And then the darkness

That yields not to light.

 

Every night I feel the absence here.

Missing

Lacking

Leaving

Me less than complete

A Failure not only in body.

 

Every night I remember those who did this.

Cutting

Killing

Stealing

Away the strength of mind

Scalpels cutting not just skin.

 

Every year I will live with this pain.

Draining

Leeching

Siphoning

The breath from my lungs

The sanity from my mind.

 

Every year I will try to face this loss.

Straining

Struggling

Failing

To carry on as whom I was before

When all of me was here.

 

But, I cannot.

Because, the man I was before

Is no more.

Reviews

[Rain]

This poem especially touched me. My surgery for Pancreatic cancer is called the "Grand Daddy" of them all. They cut out half of every organ except my heart... Only to tell me they may have given me an extra year. I know every feeling you feel. From 185 lbs, to 120 lbs. You can only adjust to the "new normal." If I can help in any way, please let me know. Rain..

[JacJak]

A very moving piece of work. All I can say is that a writing this powerful only makes me appreciate the courage and sacrifices anyone can be put through during a war and then see the affects afterwards. I think the most powerful line in the poem is "(though) my life is gone." It sets the tone of the poem and I think following stanzas just simply add more to the "deadness."

[emmajoy]

Magnificent emotion, powerful.. ready for tears yet, full of admiration. I see the human being who inside of himself is the spirit of who has always been and is now, even more courageous, bigger and better.

[Lesley]

OMG Thats AMAZING...
*SPEACHLESS*

[Emunah June.]

WOW!!