A Heart's Desire

I wish I had the courage to say

Words that'll make everything okay

But that's impossible

Given who I truly am

And the uncertainty of

What this really is.

 

I wish I could ignore

The whispers and stares of

People who've been

Where I am right now

And just focus on

What makes me happy.

 

But I can't.

 

Their stories line up

Straight as a sidewalk's edge

And plant images in my head

That I'd much rather ignore

But won't forget

Making my mind spin 'round

Like a carnival ride.

 

I wish I knew what you were thinking-

It would make everything

So much easier to

See for myself if they

Speak the truth

Or choose to spin lies

Like a spider with a web.

 

I wish you would tell me

You like me

As much as I like you

And that this isn't just some game

To see how quickly

You can get me

To sin with you.

 

But more than anything

I wish you were here

With your arms wrapped around me

Soothing my fears and whispering,

"Sweet dreams

I'll always be here."

 

 

-june22,2010

 

Author's Note

thoughts are appriciated! :)