A Shattered Heart in A Minor

About a girl; about a boy; about a band

She shouldn't have set her aspirations so high like she did. She shouldn't have never laid eyes on his face. I never should have introduced them.

Zak's band, his friends, their souls merged into one through powerful rhythms and riviting beats. His entire life revolves around music. His music -- their music. He never seemed to have time for anything else. His time was spent poised perfectly behind a microphone, behind a guitar.

He lived, breathed, ate and bathed in music. He knew all the bands, he knew all the names, the chords, the lyrics, the melodies; all of it.

Lacey was just one girl, a tiny speck on the great, massive plane that is, was, and forever will be: Zak. Lacey was smart, sweet and sensitive. She knew what she needed and also what she wanted. Unfortunately, she had great difficulty in deciding which one was most important.

I, on the other hand, am an idiot.

Three Weeks Earlier:

"Kate!" I turned to see a blonde haired, blue eyed Lacey run to catch up to me. "Where are you going?" she asked breathlessly.

"I'm actually going to Zak Fischer's house today, just to see how he and his band are getting along. Wanna come with?" Lacey nodded eagerly, given that she's never seen Zak before.

Sure, his bandmates tour the school all the time, but, unless you stumble upon the empty classroom he's practicing in, you'll never seem him outside of mandatory class. I smiled at her apparent lack of shyness and led her down the street to Zak's house.

Zak and I had always been friends and he's always, from the very first day, had an eye and ear for music. He acts as lead guitar and frontman to his band of two years, Cerebreal Cortex. I've always been an avid supporter of Zak's musical talent, mostly because I want to see him place his mark on the world someday.

About twenty feet from his house, the band's music was so much more than audible. It ws clear, crisp, prescise and professional.

Of course, the garage door was open to allow for maximum sound whithout breaking their eardrums.

"They're so good," Lacey mused after a few seconds.

"You haven't heard the half of it," I replied with a smile on my face, quickly identifying the song as "Down With Forever", an original of Cerebreal Cortex.

Presently, Zak's voice could be heard, loud and clear and beautiful, singing the lyrics he and bassist, David wrote.

"...I can't help who I am... I love what I do... and I won't lose myself in you..."

Finally, Lacey and I reached the opening of the garage, where the music was the loudest, and stood right infront of the waves of sound, letting them corse through our bodies.

All of the equipment rested on old, dirty rugs that friends and neighbours had thrown out. Cords for the electircal equipment lay here and there like dozens of sleeping snakes, feeding the sound to the amps, which pulsated with the music Zak's band creates.

As we stood there, we could feel the song reach it's height and coud see every member of the band giving it their all. You could tell because Gideon, on drums, picked up the pace and Ryan strung several complicated notes and power chords together in a method that is difficult, even for most advanced players.

Zak, who's beautiful lyric transformed into a scream so powerful, it rattled my bones, turned and assisted Ryan's solo performance with sweet, quick, underlying tones. His fingers danced along the fret board. Another fifteen seconds and the song was over, leaving enough silence for Lacey and I to clap wildly.

Zak looked up and smiled warmly. He lay down his guitar and motioned to his bandmates before sauntering over to us. The rest of the band disappeared inside his house, probably for free food and drinks, leaving Lacey, Zak and I all by ourselves.

"Hi, Kate," he drawled happily, unable to take the sleepy look from his eyes as he hugged me tightly. "I haven't seen you in a few days."

"Well, some of us don't have a musical future layed out ahead of us, so we have homework to do," I replied coyly, that got him laughing and he ran his hand through his hair to give it that tousled look. Then he noticed the third person.

"Who's your friend?" He asked, not taking his eyes off of her. She smiled widely at being noticed and introduced herself.

"I'm Lacey Monroe," she said brightly, extending her hand. Zak, always a hugger, dismissed her hand and hugged her instead.

"Well, Lacey Monroe, I'm Zak Fischer. I don't think I've seen you around school before."

"No, I'm fairly new, and, to be fair, I've never seen you before either. Kate said you like to hide in classrooms during lunch and stuff to practice," Zak turned his smiling eyes to me.

"Darn! My secret's revealed, I'll have to sit on the roof of the school now," he chuckled at his own joke and Lacey laughed too. Boisterously.

Thankfully, I saw Ryan and the rest of the band re-appear out of the house, a sandwich in one hand and a can of coke in the other, talking happily amongst themselves.

"K-K-Katie!" Ryan called, leading the rest of the band to us. "It's been s-so long s-since I've seen you!" I giggled at Ryan's stutter, as I always do, which caused him to punch me in the arm in a brotherly fashion. Ryan is the only member of the band that doesn't go to our school. Unfortunately for him, he's homeschooled.

Zak and I introduced the rest of Cerebreal Cortex to Lacey, who ate it up like gold. She smiled graciously and laughed at all the appropriate times and even asked thousands of questions about the band, which each member was more than happy to answer.

"... And you know, I could probably help make promotional flyers for your guys' shows, you know, and spread them around the school!" she said. Zak's face lit up immediately. The band had, had only a few gigs in their few short years and, each time, not a lot of people showed.

I stood there patiently, allowing Lacey to be caught up with all the attention she was recieving from the guys. I think this would be good for them, having more than one fan while they were still in the garage would definately assist in boosting band morale.

Ryan turned to me after a few seconds. "K-Katie, how's that ssssong coming along?" he asked me, referring to the lyrics I'd been meaning to conjoure up to go with a beautiful guitar part that he and Zak were going to do for me, just for fun.

"Um," I drawled. "Well, they're coming along okay, I think," I smiled. "You wanna hear what I have so far?" Ryan nodded and grabbed me by the wrist and lead me back to the garage where his guitar was still plugged into the microphone. Turning down the volume, he nodded to me and began picking away at a sweet melody that he and Zak made up one day after practice.

I waited for his cue, but it didn't come and soon, I heard Zak's own tune enter in and mix with Ryan's. I looked over to Ryan and Zak, who both nodded to me at the same time.

"I'm not so steady on my feet/ But I'm the toughest girl you'll ever meet," I cooed into the Mic, feeling a little out of place and untalented because this was the Mic that housed Zak's amazing vocal talents. I waited a few seconds before trying out a new line that I'd made up that morning. "None of you can bring me down/I've been through hell and back again... That's all I really have at the moment."

Ryan smiled at me and so did Zak, but they both kept playing on, for inspiration, I suppose. Then, they both did something that I'd never heard in the song before, they sped the song up and introduced difficult chords and quick finger picking. I stood there and watched and barely noticed that Lacey was standing there next to me.

"You guys are amazing," Lacey swooned once the two of them were done showing off.

"Thank you," Ryan said, Zak just smiled, his hungry eyes on Lacey. "Kate, y-y-you should have David help you write mmmmmmmore lyrics for you song, its pretty."

I nodded with a smile. After about twenty more minutes, I announced that I had to go home, to wich all the guys gave me a group hug, as they always do, Zak even added a quick tickle before letting me go. Lacey was going to stay after with them while Ryan walked me home.

"It's getting dark," Zak said once I protested that he should stay with everyone else. "You're going to need an escort from all the serial rapists out there."

I rolled my eyes and motioned for Ryan to follow, leaving every one else in the dust.

"She really likes him," I sighed to Ryan once we'd turned the corner and were on the street to my house.

"Y-yeah, but who doesn't?" he asked with a smile and a poke in the side.

I shrugged. "You have a point. It's a good thing that I only think of Zak as a brother, or I might be really jealous," I glanced sideways coyly and saw Ryan look away before I tackled him into a hug. He laughed.

"You're m... Mean to me," he said, struggling over his block.

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"Kate!" Lacey found me at my locker during school, retrieving a few books for my next class. She was all smiles today and glowing.

"Hey, Lacey. How was the band yesterday?" I asked, trying to make polite conversation while digging in my locker for my books.

"Oh, they were absolutely amazing in every way," she cooed, leaning against the locker next to me. "Zak is absolutley amazing, too!"

"Really," I said, still trying to find my book. It was nowhere to be seen.

"Mmhmm," she replied. "He's so absolutely adorable and talented and funny. I'm working on fliers to put around the school for their next gig. You wanna help me put them up?"

"Ah, there you are!" I pulled the book out of my locker. "Yeah, sure. When is it?"

"Next week!"

"Wow, that soon?" She nodded frantically. I closed my locker and returned the lock to it's place. I looked at her eager face, plagued with thoughts about Zak and the band and music and Zak and I couldn't resist. "Yes. Whenever you need help, just find me."

She skipped away merrily.

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"No! Your first finger goes here," Ryan said, changing my wrong finger to the right place.

"Bad finger," I chastised. Ryan smiled.

"Nnnow strum," he instructed. I did and it sounded... "Push down on the strings ha...harder," he said so I did and strummed again. "That's an F Chord."

"Oh!" I cheered. "I'm amazing! I'm the queen of the acousitc guitar!"

Ryan chuckled and strummed rapidly on his acoustic, showing off again. I rolled my eyes. "But you're the king," I admitted, that made him happy. The door from Zak's garage to the house opened and he and Lacey appeared fingers intertwined and smiling.

Zak saw me and smiled wider than he had been and stopped, causing Lacey to stop. "What are you teaching her, Ry?" he asked, though he could tell by the way that my fingers were place.

"The F chord," Ryan said proudly. "Show him, Kate."

I did as instructed and strummed the F chord, well, tried to strum the F chord. "Push down your finger's hhhharder," Ryan instructed. I pushed harder and strummed again and my F chord sounded much better.

Zak patted me brotherly on the head and gave me a 'good job' smile before motioning to Lacey to follow him, which she did with a great, skipping step. They disappeared around the corner and I looked at Ryan, who sat gazing after where Lacey and Zak disappeared.

"Ryan?" I asked. "What's wrong?"

"She's taking all his time. Band practice doesn't last as long anymmmmmore, and I barley get to see hhi..him as it is," I watched Ryan as he sighed and shook his head before returning back to me.

"So, K-Katie, how about I t... t... how about we learn the A mmminor chord?"

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Later that week, Lacey and I were in the very front row of a Cerebreal Cortex show. The small venue was actually packed with people, thanks to Lacey's seemingly brilliant marketing skills and fliers that I helped distribute.

Presently, Lacey and I were surrounded by the milling voices of dozens of people, eagerly waiting to hear some new music. There were some old faces, ones that I'd seen during a Cerebreal Cortex show before, and new ones.

Gideon and David were on stage testing the mics and equipment. Gid hit the footpedal of his drum a few times as well as the snare while David tapped the two mics that were there and played around with the guitars and bass.

"Check, check, check your pants. Hello, hello, Fiji is an island that is completely surrounded by water," a few of the people laughed uneasily, which caused David to smile. "Ohh, tough crowd," he cooed into the mic and walked away, disappearing backstage with Gid.

"I'm so excited, I mean, I finally get to see Zak and the other perform, even though I've seen them practice in his garage dozens of times, I actually get to see what all their hardwork looks like in a final finished product!" Lacey babbled on excitedly. I've no idea if she was talking to me, or talking just to talk.

I figured it was the latter of the two because she didn't even ask for a response, so I returned my attention back to the stage where Ryan appeared and picked up his guitar, quickly tuning it.

Ryan doesn't get a microphone because his speaking disability even interrupts him when he's singing, but the way that Ryan performs up there, he doesn't need a mic or words because his feelings are transferred straight through his guitar to all of us.

Finally, the rest of Cerebreal Cortex walked on stage and the crowd clapped, maybe not louder than Lacey, who was trying to catch Zak's attention, but wasn't getting anything.

"I'm so excited," Lacey said, undeterred. She looked at me expectantly and I gave her the attention she wanted.

"Why?" I asked.

"Zak's going to dedicate a song to me," she practically squealed with excitement and I couldn't help but smile back. She truly was head over heels for him and she'd barely known him two weeks. Sure, I've not been in many relationships, but I've never seen anybody fall so deeply for somebody.

"Hey, guys," Zak said, finally putting on his guitar and strumming a few quick notes. "We're Cerebreal Cortex and we're very excited to see all of you here tonight. Enjoy!"

Zak turned and said a few inaudible words to his band before turning back to the mic and the audience.

"Our first song is called 'Mendacious Impose'," Zak said and immediately launched into powerful chords while the rest of the band accompanied him perfectly.

As soon as Zak started singing, the crowd surged like a powerful wave, cheering and attempting to sing along to words that they didn't know, as all good crowds to new music do. I stood there with a smile and let the crowd ebb and flow around me, moving with energy and free spirted jerks and dances.

Their fourth song through, the crowd was cheering for more and milling about, hot and sweaty, eager to hear their next song.

Zak leaned in close to the mic. "This next song is dedicated to Lacey, so... yeah," he said and turned to Ryan, who picked several, sweet notes. I recognized the song as "Down With Forever", though Lacey didn't as she was caught up in her own little world, featuring Zak.

The song, as in their practices, began to pick up and each player put their all into this crescendo. Ryan caught my eye and he smiled widely as his fingers danced along the fretboard, to be accompanied by Zak's own musical lick and his words, and that beautiful voice that transformed into a powerful scream. Then the song was over.

The crowd cheered and hollared for more and the boys couldn't resist.

"Alright, guys, one more song!" Zak called into the mic. All the girls in the room seemed to come together to form one giant girl scream and all the guys cheered. Ryan gave me a thumbs up and I could see his hands were shaking. The poor guy had stage fright from playing in front of so many people, yet he pleayed perfectly. I chuckled and they did their final song.

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After the show and after all the electrical equipment was packed into parent's mini vans, the six of us sat in Zak's garage with a CD player going and a cooler of soda, laughing and enjoying the night.

Lacey was curled up next to a very uncomfortable looking Zak and was haning on every word he said. "I've got a few ideas for some new songs to get into our next set," he said and scratched his back, which caused Lacey to sit up, but then lean on him once he was done.

"What kind of songs?" she asked eagerly.

"Eh..." Zak began. "Well, they're just ideas right now. Nothing tangible."

"Well, I think Kate should f-finish her song," Ryan said. Gideon leaned over and poked me in the side. I jumped and smiled.

"Ryan said you needed a little songwriting help," David smiled coyly. I smiled and nodded, admitting that I needed just a little help.

Zak got up and Lacey followed him into his house. Ryan sighed and David and Gideon exchanged looks. "Business meeting," they said in unison.

"What?" I questioned, not following.

"Zak's going to talk to lacey abbbout the band. Yyyou know, a business meeting," Ryan answered.

"This isn't some innuendo I should know about?" I asked uncertainly. The three of them shook their heads.

"She's pretty devoted to him," David said. "I mean, why shouldn't she be? They made out and everything. It was pretty awkward coming to band practice and see Zak practicing his tongue on her." he shuddered.

"So now he talks to her about the next show and what we need and what he thinks she needs to do," Gideon said. "Zak's been spending quite a lot of time with her, and I mean, I'm okay with that, but... She's pretty extreme, for somebody so tiny, you know? Very hyper."

"She even wrote him this really strange letter, full of all that lovey dovey s**t that girls like to write about in their diaries. He showed it to us and I nearly gagged," David laughed. "I mean, I'm not making fun of her or anything, but that was really weird on her part and that was a really long letter."

The three of them, like the brothers they so rightfully deserved to be, took a drink at the same time, finishing their cans and crunching them on their heads, all in perfect unison.

-------------------------------------------

"No, s**t, I don't want to be bothered right now!" Zak said into his cell phone. "We're practicing for our next set." He waited a few moments, listening into the phone. "No, you can't come over, its a secret practice. Yes, I'm well aware that you can hear it from two blocks away, but I don't want anybody impeading on us," without another word, he snapped the phone shut.

Zak looked at the rest of his band, who all looked at him questioningly. "What?" He asked defensively. Ryan, who wished he could talk today, just shook his head to say that there was nothing wrong.

"Who was that, dude?" David asked.

"Who do you think it was?" Zak snapped. "Can we please practice, now?"

"Yeah, man, sure," Gideon said as David and Ryan re-tuned their guitars. "Do you like her at all?"

"What? No," he answered honestly and re-tuned his guitar as well. "She's helping to promote the band, and if all she asks in return is a kiss and a movie, then that's fine with me. You guys are first for me."

"Aw, we love you too!" David swooned and leaned on Zak playfully. Zak pushed him off with a short smile.

"Get off me, you idiot. Come on, let's practice, our next show is in a week," Zak said and they launched into their new song.

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"I think Zak hates me," Lacey exclaimed with watery eyes to me at school.

"Why?"

"Because he doesn't want to talk to me and the only thing that he cares to talk about is his band and their shows and marketing and whatever," she replied bitterly.

"Well, he is really devoted to his band," I admitted, playing the devil's advocate. "He was incredibly immersed before he met you, Lacey. I'm not saying anything, but I'm just letting you know."

"Yeah, but why would he spend all that time with me if he didn't even like me just a little?" she asked innocently.

I shrugged, refraining from saying anything to damage her. She sighed.

"I'll drop by his place after school today and see what the problem is," having stated that, she turned and bounced down the hall.

Oh boy.

I didn't go with her after school, I had a feeling that I shouldn't, so I stayed behind and went to my house instead, though I could hear Cerebreal Cortex's music all the way from there. Suddenly, it stopped and I knew that Lacey had reached her destination.

I'm not going to disclose what was said during their confrontation. All I'm going to say is that Lacey wandered her way to my house, crying her eyes out all the while. She didn't have to tell me what happened, I'd already known. In her defense, Lacey didn't know what she was getting into. In Zak's defense, other than Ryan and the others, nothing else mattered to him but his band. I was included occasionally. Zak had always been a legacy around the school, ever since that night when the band played for all those people, everybody at school wanted to hear the newest Cerebreal Cortex tunes, or know when the next show was, or even find Zak to tell him how awesome he is. Fortunately for him, he found the way to the roof and spent his free time practicing up there, sometimes with David and Ryan and Gid, but mostly by himself.

As for me, I'm still an idiot for unintentionally putting an innocent girl through all of that. She's vowed to be off of band boys from now on, and I believe her.

Anyway, I finished my song, thanks to David, and Ryan and Zak and I will be performing it for the first time at their next show. Maybe Lacey will show up, maybe not. She and I don't really talk much, now that she's found some other guy to hang on. That's fine. I still have my band boys, and Zak occasionally as well.

It's all good.

Reviews

[mirui]

this story was really fantastic. I was enthralled from start to finish. keep up the amazing work, that you do.