Drugs.

I was in all the health rooms,

I knew what they would do to me.

Did nobody else hear all those videos saying "the POSSIBLE side of affects of taking such and such?"

 

I knew i could stop when i wanted to.

Thing is, i never wanted to stop.

 

I loved what they did for me.

They relieved me of that terrible sense of isolation i had always felt.

They gave me the maunal to life that "they" had descricbed.

I could not, NOT give that up. 

 

It was like being in a car with the gas petal slammed down to the floor

Nothing to do but hold on and pretend to have some semblance of control.

But control was someting I'd lost a long time ago. 

 

I was at ease with everything.

I felt perfect. Me and the drugs were one.

One friendship that could last forever.

 

One thing i could rely on to make me feel better.

It was no longer cutting my skin open,

It was smoking, injecting, sniffing

 

Then I looked in the mirror.

chapped lips,

scratches everywhere,

blood shot eyes,

smeared eye liner,

constant shaking,

and i was dirty.

Flithy.

Disgusting.

 

I needed help but wanted none.

Author's Note

My friend helped me write two stanzas. Need some help on what to call it

Reviews

[Poetic Beauty]

There are many reason people start doing drugs in the first place but there comes a point when the person knows what is happening to their life and bodies but doesn't care. they love the drugs and how they when they are intoxicated with a false sense of reality. This is how many lose their lives. Many people have underlying issues that cause the drug use in the first place and the drugs only make it worse. You have touched on all these issues. The emotion is profound and well conveyed in this piece. I love the way you made the stanzas uneven and not lined up.

[Joe_VILOT_]

oh sweet sad addiction its embrace is the ever more mordant and leaves a wrecked husk in its grace.

[Kala Benfield]

i felt every word. it hit me. i am in the exact same f*****g boat. preach baby

[Relic]

I know many who are well into adulthood and are still suffering the affects of years of drug abuse. You've done a great job at writing the experiences of the user. Well done.

[Kat Kills]

"i needed help but wanted none" was a great way to finish it off.

[Pankaj Lohia]

this reminds me of the crytal meth poem.. its strange how one can be on control of something so artificial.. :o

[minisla]

Been through it they take your soul in the end nothings left only a shell. All good at the time but in terms of your personal well being I quit the habit. Has not been a bad day since.

[Cidney009]

Ive been there, This is powerful. Ive looked in the mirror and seen the same person.

[Tracey C.]

Really Well Written!

I have been there too, never fun.. =/

[soliloquy]

In the 3rd stanza you misspell manual.

I enjoyed reading this. I have been there. Its freaking scary and hard to describe.