Identity Walk

This was for my Early Childhood Education Class. We had to take of the prompts and assume that Identity the one that I chose was "Assume you were a 10-year-old Latina girl in Middle Class American family with two Lesbians for parents."

 

 

 

Identity Walk

I am not a normal child.  My name is Xuxa, which means Female of Xerxes; I am a ten-year-old, chocolate eyed, Latina girl living with my parents in America.  I attend Roosevelt Elementary school in Plover, Wisconsin; population 10,520 or so. Miss. Bastion said the last census tells that from the year 2000. I just don’t understand why I had to be different.

Sometimes I wonder where my father went. Why he never comes to see me.  Why won’t my parents ever talk about him?

  “Did he ever love me?” I used to ask my mother, “Did he even care for us?”

“Hush child,” Jamie would reply, smoothing out the unruly black mane I imagine I got from him. “It is time for bed. You have school tomorrow.” Jamie always held me tightly, kissing my forehead. She would then tuck the covers in around me. “Your Mother will be in shortly, love.” She then stood up and crossed the room opening the door her hand resting above the light switch, “I love you, with all my heart.” She would then blow me a kiss and exit the room leaving the light on.  I could always hear them talking but never understood what they said; it was always muffled.  I would then close my eyes; Momma would be in soon, I would smile.

 Later on I did find out about their muffled conversations behind my door by listening in through the crack that Jamie had left one night after she thought she shut it.

“She’s asking again.” Jamie would say with her arms crossed , as she always did when she was unhappy or angry.

“What did you tell Xuxa this time?” she would ask her blue eyes dancing with fear on the brim of tears looking at the floor.

“I told her nothing but people are beginning to ask her questions.  We need to tell her soon.” I heard Jamie say exasperated, “She’s ten you knew this day would come, her arms raised palms up then laid them back at her sides, “I warned you that it would be hard, Trysta, did I not? She raised one eyebrow in question.

“Yes, you did Jamie,” she said looking up into the green eyes she trusted for the last 15 years, “I just worried she’ll hate us is all.”

“Oh, Trysta, she’s our daughter we love her and she loves us. I don’t think that she’ll hate us.” Jamie said as I watched her pull momma into a tight hug then they kissed. “It will be fine darling just tell her okay? It’s time that she knows about why she is different.

"I crept back to my bed and stared at the ceiling so I would finally get to know why I was different.  Why I didn’t have a father all these years.  Why the kids at school tease me for having two moms." I tried hard to not look anxious as momma came into the room.

I heard the door open and smiled at Momma walked in followed by Jamie. “Honey, I heard you had a bad day at school again.  The kids were teasing you again weren’t they? Momma asked worried cupping the side of my face and kissing my forehead in almost the same spot that Jamie had.

Momma climbed into the bed next to me and wrapped her arms around me.  “Jamie says you’ve been asking about your father again as well.” She started matter-of-factly

“I nodded.” From between them as Jamie was not sitting on my other side in my small apartment bedroom.

“Well before you were born Jamie and I decided that we wanted a child and since we are both women we could not have a child of our own. We then went to a special doctor that did a procedure to that I could become pregnant with you using Jamie’s egg and anonymous sperm donor.  We really don’t know who the father is honey, But know that we love you and we always will and no matter what your family is all you will need.  You tell those others kids what you feel safe telling them.  Tell them you are loved by your mothers, and then if they don’t leave you alone you go the teacher and she can call us okay?

I nodded to this day those words ring in my ears “you tell them you are loved an always will be. From that moment on I held the world finally knowing the truth.  It would be many years before I truly understood what it was that Momma and Jamie had told me. All I know is that love is enough to  get you through any situation.  For me that was enough, the kids eventually left me alone once we had a meeting with some of the other kids, my parents, their parents and principle.  I finally gained a few friends when I entered High school.  The color of my skin ai attribute to my father wherever he is now.  I am proud of who I am this summer Jamie and Mom are helping to pay a trip to Spain so that I can finally learn about who I really am while studying abroad.  I really do love my life.  I am very thankful for a family that loves me so much.  I am happy that they choose to tell me the truth instead of hiding it.

         

 

Author's Note

Please understand this is completely made up and most likely will be altered due to me not liking how abruptly it shifts to her being older. The prompt was for 1-1 1/2 pages I wrote 3.