Do I Pull The Trigger?

Do I pull the trigger?

I’m trapped. Held up in this trapezium

maze. I’ve been running, calling for help

but I think I ran into a dead end. I’m afraid of

my reflections. On these mirrors I keep

searching for perfections.

 

I want to write. I need to write but

I keep replenishing. My skills keep

On degrading. Do I need to beg my own

Self to write more or do I just let it go, and

Be nothing more than a tarnished nobody?

 

My emotions are scattered like this poem

I’m scrabbling. To be blunt, my feelings are

Everywhere. They scatter like cockroaches.

There’s no control of any kind I have over

My emotional self.

 

I’m holding myself at gun point. There’s

Nowhere left to run except for me to pull

This trigger and take this life threatening risk

To either try to find myself or just die.

Reviews

[jacob erin-cilberto]

just like we are disgusted by cockroaches and they make us so uneasy when we see them....feelings can be that same way...we can look at ourselves and hate what we see...hate that part of us that scatters all over in the dark...those depressed emotions that want to eat the leftovers of our heart.
j.

[Zipho_D]

Sometimes we just feel like we have had enough and just want to rise above it all. Thanks J.

[barleygirl]

This is a great cockroach analogy, Jacob! I also really loved the cockroach line in this poem. Your writing is very raw & original-sounding, Zipho! I love the way "pulling the trigger" can mean more than just the obvious meaning (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Zipho_D]

Margie I strongly appreciate all your inputs. I'm only 19 and yet I'm able to communicate to every person's age. Thank you so much.

I'm also loving your work