H. Lauder

Loose hearthstones exposing my ledger

Living fast while I coast on the edge 

Peak off the ledge teary Tearing goodbye notes from my ledger 

She isn’t ready for the truth So it’s lies that I tell her

This is just between me and you

I don’t think I could tell her

Afraid I might be jealous I want her to myself

Or does this make me selfish? 

Choosing her over wealth

Now does this make me selfless? 

I would give her the world

I mean is she really worth this? 

The last thing I want is to be Is broken hearted & worthless

Stuck searching for a purpose

Inflicting cracks within the surface

But all I see is a graze

Looking out to the meadows & all is see is the graves

Behaviors ingrained From the way that I’m raised

Problems are growing insane

Pain’s the paint I been watching dry

Eyeing pages gliding through the sky

Got a couple contemplating suicide

Even more with scratched out lines

Ironic how the words Just seem to flutter in mind

Getting caught up in my chest

& exploding through my pen 

Too much ink already spent Now my worth is in suspense

As I search for every cent

Slowly losing all my sense & subtracting all the rest

Stress has etched an S within my chest

No use in telling you I use a pencil instead

Dreams realized by the lead

Only taught me to lead

Gathered that these wants Only evolve into needs

Flagg found me kneeling a church

From darkness there’s only birth 

Author's Note

What do you think