The Return to Nothing

There was a valley far in the quiet north. A thick, gray blanket of clouds often covered its sky, so that the stars could not see the ground. Not so far below, the crests that led to the valley floor were snow packed and always soft, even along the dirt road down into the valley. The path flowed straight into a crisp pine forest, trees as vast as the time that grew them. In the complete darkness under the giants, gullies, ditches, fallen trees, streams barred the winding and unsure way through. The few birds that flew through did not linger. Outside the forest, the path continued again like a shot on to the lake.

Snow was oft everywhere: the trees, the road, and the vast plains of quiet. Even the lake ice was dotted with snow-covered holes where people from the nearby village went ice-fishing. Standing on the road's end at the side of the mere, you could see that very village, distant but welcoming in this vast land of unceasing and empty cold.

And on a glacial, windy night and deep night when these things were in place, a man walked into the valley, down the crests. If a traveler were walking with him, they mightn't have see his face: the moonlight died trying to overthrow the clouds. Soon enough the forest rose up to meet this dark figure, and he ventured in without slowing. Through that dark cranny of the world he trod, never ceasing his march: he hopped skipped and stepped over every malformation without a second thought, even in the dark. Then he emerged. He stopped at trail's end and gazed out over the lake. Not a sound was heard, not an echo 

There was a lone, snow-covered fir tree near where he was standing, and he took notice. He walked over near it and focused, trying to make out something that was carved into the bark of the tree. He couldn't see whatever he was looking for, so he refocused his posture and continued on to his destination; the other end of the lake. The marking on the tree was a heart, and it had had a massive effect on his past.

He strode the few hundred meters distance beside the lake until he reached a point where the left-hand bank was wide enough to walk on. Now he took more care in walking, so as not to walk upon the thin ice on the surface of the water. As he got closer to the lighted homes, one could make out the man's features more clearly. He man was a character of about thirty. His face was hard and emotionless, with cheekbones set midways up his face and his eyes set close. His mouth moved slightly, as if he were mumbling, but no sound came out, only frozen, air. His blond hair was growing long, as it was beginning to cover his eyes. He stood completely straight.

After a few minutes of walking, he reached the center of the village and felt that warmth that many souls felt when they came. He turned his head about and looked at each of the houses, slowly, as if he were remembering something. He then moved toward a house to the left of him.

As he approached, he braced himself for what they would say to him. He hadn't seen them in over nine years. He stiffened himself and stepped up to the door and knocked. He heard a shuffling inside, then steps coming closer to the door. He breathed in, then out. Ahhhhhh, Huuuuuu. He heard the door being unlocked, and then it opened inward, revealing a woman inside. She was gorgeous. She had blond hair; Her face was delicate and young, about twenty-four years old. She stood gracefully in the doorway, one hand holding the door, and the other hand behind her back. The man outside the door said nothing as they stared at one another. She spoke.

"Hello? May I help you, sir?" She was only in the dark a few moments. When the man stepped into the lighted hallway, his face became clear.

"Oh..." The woman gasped. "But... but..." She looked stunned as she looked up at the man in the doorway.

"Who is it, Felicity?" An older sounding voice called from deeper inside the house. . "No!" The woman yelled out. She burst into tears. She pushed past the man and ran out of the house.

The man stood in the entryway, waiting.

"Felicity, what happened? The other man asked. He strode around the corner, into the man's view.

"Sir, what are-" He stopped short.. Neither of the men said anything.

"Hello." The blond man stated shortly. His voice showed no emotion.

The second man did not respond right away. He gazed the new man up and down.

"S...Son? Is that you? Davy?" The older man said weakly. He was leaning upon a cane. In his left hand, he held a novel. On his face was gray stubble, unkempt. His eyes had circles under them. All in all, he looked tired.

"Yeah. It's me dad." The son said with a slight smile.

With this comment, a tear rolled down the father's cheek. He smiled and sniffed. For many minutes they both stood in the hallway, feeling the emotions...

"Well, my boy, shut that door an' come on inside. Yer lettin' out the heat." His father said, and walked into the living room. Davy shut the door. He walked into the living room. It was a square room with a roaring fireplace in the far right corner. Two couches sat facing the fireplace. Right of the fireplace was the window that looked out onto a dark night.

On the left side of the room was another entryway that led to a kitchen.

Davy's father had already reached a couch and plopped himself down. He looked over at Davy.

He stepped over and sat down on the couch adjacent to his father. He leaned back, but did not slouch.

"So, David, tell me what's happened. How've you been?"

Davy did not reply for a moment.

"Can we talk about it over dinner?"

The father was silent for a moment..

"Sure. Why not?" He said, "Hey, Jenny! We got a visitor." He said loudly in the general direction of the second door.

"Oh?" A voice said, from somewhere deeper in the house. Davy recognized it as his mother's.

"Yeah," His father said. "He's wondering' if he can get some dinner from us."

Davy quickly looked at his dad, and then turned his gaze toward the doorway to greet his mother.

"Well, I hope it's not that cat again, bless my soul," The woman's voice came closer now. "Because I just don't know if the things I'm cookin' it are really health-" She stopped her speech as she rounded the corner and gazed upon the figure of her son.

"Ahh!" She yelped, and dropped the silverware she was carrying. They clattered to the floor."N...no. It's not David? Not my Davy?" She said. She reverently walked over to David and put her hand to his arm..

 

"It's me, ma. It's been a while." David said. He smiled at his mother and looked into her eyes. She cried.

"David, where have you been?" Jenny asked. "Why did the army send a letter?"

"They didn't know where I was." David said.

No one said anything for many moments. Then, David's mother stood up.

"Well. You've certainly changed since last time I saw you." She said with a sniff and smile.

"I have." David said. His mother looked at him again.

"We'll talk about it over dinner." His dad said, grinning at David

"I'd better go tell Felicity you're back." Her mother said cheerily, and began to walk toward the hallway.

"She already knows, mom." David said. "She uhhh..."

His mother stopped and turned around.

"Davy..." She said with uncertainty.

"What? Is something wrong?" David asked

His dad suddenly stood up.

"I'll go and talk to 'er, Jenny." He volunteered. He grabbed his cane and moved toward the entrance to the hallway. He walked with a limp.

"Is she okay?" Jenny asked.

David's father didn't answer, but just kept on walking. He turned the corner, out of their sight.

"Mom." David said bluntly from his seated spot.

"Yes?" His mother answered.

"Is Felicity alright? She ran away when she first saw me."

His mother seemed stumped and surprised by the question.

"Uh. Eh..." She looked at the wooden floor, searching for an answer. She responded in a nervous voice. "Sh-She was just surprised to see you. That's all." She smiled, trying to get over that moment's awkwardness.

"Oh..." David said.

Jenny turned and walked back toward the kitchen.

"I'm finishin' up dinner now. You'd better go and wash your hands." She said, and then disappeared around the corner, into the kitchen.

David stood up slowly and walked toward the hearth, then stopped in front of it. He squatted down and put his hands up to the fire, rubbing them together occasionally. After a few minutes of this, he stood up again. He walked out of the living room and down the hallway, up the stairs and to the washroom.

* * *

Five minutes later, David and Jenny and Solomon -David's father- were seated on the couches. Jenny and Solomon were on one couch, and David was on the other. Between the two couches stood a long table, with three plates of spaghetti resting on top of it.

"Who should say grace?" Jenny asked.

"Why don't you, mom?" David said quickly.

David's mother said the prayer, but David kept his eyes open and his head up.

With the closing "amen", Solomon quickly raised his head and grabbed his plate off the table. He picked up a fork as well and began to eat. Jenny picked up her plate and fork and began eating politely. David sat and did not touch his food. He was trying to think of what to say.

"So. Nine years. Tell me what's been happening out here." He said to them, spreading his hands and looking around the room.

His mom answered first.

"Ever since you left to join the army, people have been saying how lonely it is without you. Why just last week, Mrs. Margot said it was too quiet without Davy running around the village asking to do stuff."

"Yeah." Solomon said, barely swallowing a bite of food. "The square has been awful quiet without you. Remember how the little kids used to ask for David to come and play with 'em? It was kinda sad, cuz after you left, none of em' wanted to play anymore. Most of them said it was too boring." He paused to eat a mouthful of food.

"Yes. And now all those kids that used to play all the time have grown up and moved away. There are hardly any children left in the square." Jenny said. The three of them paused to let the statement sink in. In his mind, David did not want to accept that his friends were gone. He didn't want change, really. David did not want to accept that the only thing that never changes is the fact that everything changes. Like when you go to an old house that you've moved out of, and there's new furniture, new carpet, new paint on the walls. It has all changed.

"So David," Said his mother after she had finished a forkful of food. "Tell me about what happened to you."

"Yeah, Davy. What happened? We got a letter four or five years ago that you had been reported MIA. We all figured you had been..." His dad didn't finish the statement. He did not need to.

"Well..." David began. He reached down to the table and lifted his plate up. He smelled the smell of his mother's cooking and savoured it.

Jenny and Solomon were waiting patiently for him to begin. His mom had her hands in her lap. His dad had leaned back on the couch and was now watching him.

"You know how we were fighting in the jungles of the south? Four and a half years ago, we were on a scouting mission. I was a sniper. We were looking for a squad that may have had some survivors, when our unit was ambushed by guerrillas. They had anticipated what we were going to do. We walked straight into a trap." He stopped and took a bite of his food.

David then explained to his mother and his father what he had been through in the south. The horrors, the blood. The death. How it had changed his outlook. But he also told them about how he had been found and liberated from his horrid, cursed situation. It took him over an hour.

"...as soon as I could. Now that I'm back here, everything has changed. My friends are gone; my old life is not the same." He finished. He was now quite warm, as he had been speaking non-stop. He unbuttoned the top of his shirt.

"Nine years..." Solomon stated.

"Yeah, nine years... But I still hope..."

Neither David nor his parents said anything else for a long time. After a few minutes of silence, a meek voice sounded behind them.

"D...David."

David turned his head quickly to gaze at the newcomer. It was Felicity. She stood there sweetly and humbly, her hands in front of her, and her hair was down. She wore a soft nightgown.

"Felicity." David said. "I...I..." He had no words. This was his love. Felicity just smiled meekly. Solomon spoke up, suddenly.

"Why don't you two take a stroll outside? I'm sure you have a lot to talk about."

"Yeah..."

Some minutes later, David and Felicity were walking away from the house together. The lady now had on a denim jacket and sweatpants. They walked side by side, through the cold night. For many minutes, neither of them said anything. Then Felicity spoke.

"So, David, what was the army like? Was it hard? Fighting like you did?"

"Maybe some parts were difficult, but most of it was easy." David said as they reached the well.

"I thought it would be really hard, you know, fighting." Felicity said. She looked at David as she talked. David looked straight ahead.

"The only hard part was the moisture of the jungle. But even that was put off by the fact that I was fighting for my life."

"Yeah." The couple had gotten quite beyond the well and were strolling away from the light of the village.

"Were you listening when I was telling the story?" David asked.

"Yeah. It was pretty scary, wasn't it?"

"Uh-huh. But I always kept up the hope that I could come back. You know what I mean?" He looked at Felicity with a smile.

"Mhm." Felicity said quietly as they reached the sight of the lake.

They strolled nearer and nearer to the lakeside. When they reached it they stopped, and David spoke once more.

"The lake has grown even more beautiful since I was last here. Like you."

Felicity chuckled silently, so that David could not hear. But she smiled sweetly. She could tell he was trying to flirt with her, like in the past. She could tell that he still loved her. However...

"Come on, let's go over to the other side of the lake, like we used to." David said. Felicity responded by walking toward the wide bank, and David followed. Felicity was looking out over the frozen water.

"I remember the time we walked over here. It was just before I left, I think. Do you remember?" David tried to look at Felicity for recognition. He could not see her face.

"Yeah, I remember that." She said. David caught a hint of exasperation on her breath. He said nothing about it.

"We carved our initials in a heart on the tree. You said you thought we were too old to do it." David said this with a sigh of remembrance. "But I said it would be like a tribute to us, so we did it."

They had now reached the wide bank. David could now make out the tree by extremely shining moonlight.

"I remember all these things, David." Once again, David heard annoyance in her voice. She did not look at him when he spoke. He made one last attempt.

"Afterward, we gazed out over the lake until you fell asleep. I remember looking at you and thinking of our life. And...and..." David could not say anymore.

They were almost to the tree. Felicity seemed to be keeping her distance from David.

"Felicity..." He started. He could not speak at first. Then the words came.

"I'm a better man, now. I can be with you, now that the war is over." He held out his hand and stopped her. Felicity answered.

"David, I've changed too. You might as well know..." She stopped and looked away, into the trees.

"Know what?" David said. He moved so that he was between Felicity and the tree.

"I...I…I'm getting married, David."

The young man was silenced. He looked at Felicity straight.

"Oh..." He could find no more words than that. He looked down, now. A cold wind pierced David..

"David, it has been nine years. I, no, we all thought you were dead. We all thought you were gone. I've moved on."

David said nothing. He couldn't. Felicity continued.

"David, you have come home expecting things to be the same things. But nine years changes a lot."

"That's not true..."

"Can you really say it isn't true? You always were a man to savor the past."

David did not respond this time.

"So, I'm sorry, but I'm different too." She said nothing else.

David noticed nothing but the cold. It was as if he had been struck with a thousand icy spears. He looked at Felicity, but, once again, the darkness blocked his vision.

"Felicity..."

"I'm sorry David."

With that, Felicity walked past David, away from the tree, the lake, and everything. He unleashed muffled sobs of agony. David stood there for a long time, waiting, crying. It was as if an entire mountain of emotion had suddenly consumed him. After a time of standing, freezing, lost, and forlorn, he straightened himself up and looked around. The tears that he cried had frozen solid on his cheeks. He wiped them away with his hand, then walked back towards the square.

* * *

At 1:00 in the morning, the man got up from his bed and turned on the light. He looked about the bedroom, at the bed, the dresser, the lamp. He moved over to the desk in the corner. On it rested a pen and a piece of paper, for taking notes. He picked up the pen and put it to the paper, but didn't write for a moment. Then the words came.

To whom it may concern,

This was my home. It is no longer. Most of the things I remember here are gone. My life is different, and I feel I can no longer stay. You may clean out my room, if needed. I wish Felicity all the best with her new life.

David

He finished and set the pen down. He walked over to the dresser and brought out some clothing. But he only took the basics. He also reached into another drawer and brought out a small pouch. He opened it and brought out some money, about one-hundred dollars. Then, he put the wallet back into the drawer and shut it.

He went over to the closet, pulled out an old suitcase, and folded and placed the clothes inside the case neatly, and shut it. He then pulled on a wool shirt and a heavy jacket, also of wool. He slipped into sweatpants and wool socks and snow boots.

Before he turned out the light, he took one last look around the room that was once his, but wasn't anymore. After a long moment, he clicked the light off, walked out into the hall, shutting the door behind him.

Walking into the hall, he stopped and looked down at the two other bedroom doors.

"Good-bye, Felicity." He whispered, and then moved down the stairs and out of the house.

Outside, it was still dark. The stars shone brightly in the night sky, and no lights were on in the village. However, David needed no light; he knew the area well. He strode quickly and stiffly through the snow, carrying the case with his clothes. He reached the lake and turned himself at a right angle so he would eventually reach the wide bank. His steps once again became careful when he reached the edge of the lake.

As he neared the path that stopped at the lake, he slowed his step, and turned back around and faced the lake and the village. The man could actually see his home very clearly; the clouds had cleared up since earlier in the evening. The moon cast a pale glow over everything. It illuminated the forest, the silent homes, the well, and the shining, frozen lake. He took a deep breath and continued into the forest. As he walked through the forest, he put his right hand in his sweater and felt the bullet hole that rested over his heart. Once the man was out on the road, he stopped again and looked both ways on the road.                                     

Well, here we go. My God, nothing in life ever stays the same, does it? He thought, and began walking eastward, down the path.

However, as he distanced himself from the village, his legs seemed to vanish, just disappear. His torso and arms followed. Then, he evansced altogether. And just like that, David Northwind was never seen or heard from again.

 

The End

Author's Note

Reviews are gladly accepted. This is my first story, so..

Reviews

[Tori]

....I.....Oh my god....I just.....wow. I thought I wrote depressing stuff but man! That was...wow. I just sort of skimmed at first, but it quickly captured me. I had to go back and read it. It was...amazing! You have incredible talent. Wow. I regret not reading this sooner! Poor David. That must be quite a terrible thing to go through. Wow....absolutley amazing! Such wonderful descriptions and I loved the emotion you put in here! I don't usually read real word stuff but...Dear Lord, this story is...it's just amazing!

[ORBLE]

whoa ! That was so good. Usually I don't read long stories here, on the computer, but that was amazing!! The descriptive language of the characters were so clear I felt as though I was staring right at them. You gave subtle hints and as the story went on, the plot came together and the ending was really concise too, which is always good. I am kind of speechless really ! You should carry it on and publish it as a short story because I am sure people would read it. Wow

[::Yv0nne::]

W-O-W.....Zac this is truly amazing!!!! I finally got around to reading it and i have no idea why i waited so long...You are so very talented i have to tell u that and i am truly amazed. This is very, very good and you had me from begining to end. I love the way you decribe everything, every detail...and i loved the ending...it made me cry...really. Now i really cannot wait to read your new one!!! I'm so glad i have u to help me with mine :o)