Blue Rose and Raven: Chapter Fifteen

After learning the truth of his situation, Marius returns with an ultimatum for the Beast.

I sat in the silence of my room on my bed brooding. I breathed deeply and tried to calm my racing heart. The unmistakable feeling of betrayal was lodged in my heart like a spike. I’d never felt anything like this before. I’d felt so close to someone only to be wounded like this. What did this mean for my entire being here? Was it truly all a lie? Was I a fool for leaving in Mother’s place? My trust in the Beast’s kind and consoling words in my time of need were in doubt. What was the truth and what were her lies?

I could just leave, I thought. There’s nothing stopping me from walking out the front door and leaving this place behind. As she said, she’d rather be forgotten by the world. I could give her what she wanted and leave her in this miserable place. This prison she’d created for herself.

            My darker thoughts troubled me. I never thought myself a cruel person. But in times like this, I observed, the cruelest ideas possible surfaced like dead wood. If I were not in my right mind, I would have held onto them and fueled the anger the Beast’s confession awakened in me. But I didn’t hold on to them. I let them go and returned to myself, for I remembered what I saw in her memories. I remembered that she was once just a sad young girl. A child who wasn’t loved by those who should have loved her the most. My heart ached for that child as it ached when the Beast wept. There was no reason for her to think these things about herself. She was not unworthy of love. It was the weight of her past that held her back. It was this place and the memories in its walls. Their poison.

            I stood and wandered over to the large window. I stared out into the endless night, at the large, silhouetted bell tower. I gazed into the garden illuminated by the ghost-lights. Then something strange caught my eye. Amidst the limpid firelight, there was another light. A small, barely flickering gleaming shining a deep and rich blue. I moved closer to the glass and squinted. In the darkness amidst the tangled vines and bountiful bushes of the garden was a single blue rose. It glowed like a tiny blue star. Dewdrops twinkled on its petals. It was as beautiful as the Beast had said.

 

            I left my room in search of the Beast. I walked to each wing of the manor until I found her in the library. She sat in her massive chair staring into the lit fireplace, her scaled hand draped on the rest. I took a breath. I did not know what would happen next. I only knew what I wished to say. “Beast,” I said aloud. “I need to talk to you.”

            The Beast said nothing.

            “I understand that you have been lying to me in the time I have spent here. And I realize that you did so for your own reasons,” I said carefully, then stopped to consider my words again. “But I am not angry with you.”

            With that, the Beast’s form shifted. She climbed from her chair and stood, facing me. “Then what are you still doing here?” She mumbled. “You can leave.” She threw out a hand. “So leave. Forget this place. Forget me.”

            “No.” I said flatly.

            “Why are you so stubborn?” The Beast huffed, clutching the bridge of her beak. “I’ve selfishly kept you here against your will and yet you remain! Go away and never come back! I demand you leave me!”

            “No.” I said again, taking another step forward. “I refuse to leave this place without you.”

            The Beast recoiled. She shook her head in disbelief. “You’re�"you’re serious.”

            I nodded.

            “But why?” She whispered. “Why do you waste your efforts on me? You have a family. You have a life. I have this house.” She gestured around her. “This is where I belong. This�"This is my home.”

            “This place is a prison!” I said forcefully. I realized how loud my voice was from the echoes. I collected myself. “Don’t you see? You’ve quartered yourself off from the world. This place is an island with nothing but pain and terrible memories.” I stepped closer. “This place is a tomb, not a home. You don’t belong here, Beast! You belong out there! You belong out in the world with people who would care about you!”

            “You are angry with me.”

            “I’m not! I’m angry at whatever sickness is in your head telling you’re worthless because you’re not. You are more than what they made you feel. You are more than what your father or your mother or those people who should’ve given a damn about you made you feel!” My thoughts turned to Mother, Connie, August. Camille. Elaine. Caesar. I felt my eyes getting wet. “Because whatever they gave you wasn’t love. And everyone deserves to be loved.” Tears roll down my cheeks. “Even you.”

            I felt close to weeping. Every moment of the Beast’s sad past mixed with every great moment I realized I’d taken for granted from my own. Mother’s warm embraces. Connie and August’s protection of me and playful nudges. Elaine’s resolve with my doubts of the future. Caesar’s innocence. It was all so valuable, so important. Now I understood how it felt to lack it. And it made me so angry that the Beast was denied it. It was unfair. It was cruel. And I cursed myself for not realizing it was the reason why I cared. They were the reason.

            We stood silently together. The Beast shifted in place, nervously sliding her fingers over the head of her cane. The blue lights of the room and the light of the fire danced off her feathers, splitting her in half.

            “Do you mean that?” She finally said.

            “Yes.” I replied.

            “And about my lie. You are not angry?”

            “I forgive you.”

            The Beast rested her hand on her collarbone. Her throat bobbed as she forced something down. She looked around the room, eyes darting back and forth. Her chest rose and fell several times. Then a sense of realization dawned in her eyes.

            “If you truly mean what you say. If you truly believe me worth extending such kindness,” She declared through a trembling voice. “Then I will leave with you.”

            I broke the gap between us and embraced her. She in turn gripped me tightly. I felt her heartbeat through her chest. It was slow and steady. Her lavender scent was wonderful.

 

            “I want you to come home with me,” I said to the Beast as we walked in the garden one last time. “I want you to meet my family.”

            “I don’t know if they will accept me,” She replied nervously. “I have been keeping you captive. They have every reason to hate me.”

            “I will help them understand,” I reassured her.

            The Beast nodded yet worry showed on her face. “How long do we plan to stay?”

            “Just for a few days. Just enough time to get to know them and see who you really are. And when you’re ready, I’ll come back with you.”

            “No, please. Let me return on my own,” she said, laying a hand on my arm. “I appreciate your kindness. But after my past actions I feel I must remain here alone.”

            My heart sank. I should’ve known that the weight on her heart would not go so easily. I banished the thought for the time being. “Agreed.”

            “I am afraid, Marius. I am petrified of leaving this place.” Then her eyes lit slightly. “But…There is a certain thrill in seeing the outside again after so long. It will be like stepping into a new world.” The edges of her beak curled upward. “It will be nice to see the sun again.”

            I smiled in turn. Her smile was a pleasant sight. “When do you feel ready to leave.”

            The Beast looked at me. In her eyes was a sense of determination. “Immediately.”

            As we left the garden, I noticed more little points of light on the rose vines. The garden emanated a slight but surely growing halo of blue light. I knew the Beast must have noticed.

Author's Note

General thoughts please.