22

As the Children of Hositma came out of the mountains they dug holes in the ground and piled rocks on the sides and put skins across the tops of sticks and sod for the roofs to hold the sand and gravel back so they didn’t cave in. Some were huge for they started with just a couple and then they added holes as the families grew. The bigger the family the more they liked it was and only the barren dared ask Jesus to make mates.

He is in a Maze of Rooms, Hiiamor, had eighteen children and had built a maze of extra rooms for all his kids, building one huge one and then smaller ones as each of his boys, he had thirteen boys, to live in and they each had children and they did the same so that the entire family was connected with each family having an exit/entrance with steps going up and down at the same hole in the roof where they stayed most of the day rather than be in their rooms even in the heat of the day. The daughters went to other mazes with their husbands when they married except sometimes even the girls had rooms for they didn’t marry until they were older and needed privacy of their own. The roofs were a mound of sod that provided runoff so that the homes did not get muddy or wet the walls to cause mudslides.

Hiiamor was old and he and his wife had parted when she died and he was the one they all came to for wisdom or to make some bargain binding or even to get his blessing on their children or to secure his blessing for their marriage. He had a big room all to himself and they would gather on rainy days to have a feast.

The old man had many nightmares and would wake up with a start or startled awake just as Jesus took the dreams away about his children being hurt. But the dreams were bothersome to him even awake and he thought he was being visited by evil spirits or A Bad Creature Out of the Abysses or Abcoota. Finally he was sitting alone in the dark room before a flat rock where he also ate and he put his head down on the huge flat shale in his arms and began to cry.

“Hiiamor,” Jesus called to him, “Why do you cry?”

“Oh, Lord,” he said, looking up with tears coming down like rain, “My floor. It is wet from weeping. I am not a bad man, am I?”

Jesus replied, “No worse than most.”

“Then why do the abcoota come and catch me sleeping and torment my rest. I cannot sleep anymore without them,” he complained.

Jesus said, “There is no such thing.”

“Oh, but Lord,” he cried, “There are. They keep me awake. They will not leave me so I can sleep. I close my eyes and their form is there. Then they torment me. I will die if I cannot sleep.”

“Not true old man,” Jesus said. “You do not need to sleep. Just rest your bones and they will heal. Whether you sleep or not your body needs rest. You sit up worrying all your days.”

“I cannot help it. When I close my eyes they are there and even when my eyes are open. Sometimes as hideous creatures. Sometimes as old friends that have died and gone to the abyss. Men that were better than I. I have done many things wrong to feed my family. I have cheated and taken advantage of many, bargaining for sheep to cloth and keep this family warm in winter and cool in the heat. So many I cannot count them all.”

“All you have to do Hiiamor is to change your mind,” Jesus said, “And ask me to forgive you for I will have to die to take your place in the abyss and you will go to Aptlief. Haven’t you ever heard of it?”

“I know it is your good news but how will I know when I have been in the abyss so long? How will I know to even come out?” he asked.

“You need not go,” Jesus said. “Believe me. I have come to take care of your wrongdoings.”

“But what if I am really evil and have done something worthy of death and then the abyss forever?” he asked.

“Have you Hiiamor?” Jesus replied, “I am not aware of it.”

“So many times I have done wrong,” he said, “I ask you to forgive me and you do but still I am guilty of causing your death, Lord my God!”

“You never should have said that,” Jesus said, “You should not have even thought that.”

“See?” he said. “I am evil. I have killed you over and over all my life and killing you is more evil than blasphemy.”

“This is very serious,” Jesus said. “You must die.”

“I knew it,” he said. “But I am afraid to die. I am a cowardly man.”

“Be brave Hiiamor,” Jesus said, “Die and all this will be changed.”

“How do you know?” he asked with huge tears running down his face.

“Your wrongdoing is nothing more than not believing in me. You must trust me to raise you. But to do that you must die,” Jesus replied.

“I cannot die,” he said.

“Yes,” Jesus said, “But you can. I will be there to bring you back. Then you can have your rest awake or asleep.”

Then he said, “But the abcoota will stop me. I am sure of it. See? The Jesus I know is an abcoota. He does not want me to live but to die.”

“There is no such thing,” Jesus said. “Only in your dreams and in your thoughts that you dream about. Once there was a very long time ago. You were alive back then once too. No one is deceiving you Hiiamor. You will die. I will raise you. Then you will live. Do not die this way. I say that because your time is near.”

“When I die,” he said, “Then you will show me you are an abcoota and laugh at me like they all do.”

“You believe that, Hiiamor,” Jesus said, “Now believe me.”

“Will you give me a sign?” he asked, “One that I will believe?”

He had stopped crying when a young boy came into the big room named, He is my sunshine, or Hims.

“You talk, Father of Mine,” he said, “Nobody here, fom.”

“Go away! I am talking to God,” he said.

“God,” Hims said, “Where?”

“There is no God here,” he said, “Only abcoota.”

“Oh, fom,” Hims said, “Wake up. Then sleep again. The abcoota go away.”

“He does, doesn’t he?” he said. “Thank you very much. Now off with you your mom (Which means mother of mine) will be worried sick.”

“Mom?” he said.

“Hims! Where are you?” his mother called.

“Here!” he yelled. “I always here. When I go I am still here. When I stay I am still here.”

“You’re a smart little guy, aren’t you?” Hiiamor said and then turning to his mom he yelled. “In here!!!”

In a moment his mother was there scolding him for running off and dragging him by the hand as he tried to say, “Bye-bye fam.”

Then the old man straightened his legs and laid back on the rug and soon was off to sleep.

He dreamed that a man was there with him who called himself Jesus and he wanted him to die and it startled him awake again.

“What startled you?” Jesus asked as he stood before him manifested as the man in Hiiamor’s dreams when he was dreaming about his thoughts.

“Am I awake or asleep!!!” he screamed.

“You dreamed you were awake,” Jesus said, “But you dreamed I was standing here wanting you to die.”

“Oh!” Hiiamor said, “If I am awake in my sleep and wake up and I’m still awake? Was I ever asleep?”

Jesus shook his head.

“You?” he said. “You are you! You are Jesus!”

Then Jesus stood there studying his eyes as the old man realized what it meant.

“I can die!” he said. “How?”

“Just die,” Jesus said and he suddenly lay limp on the floor. Then he was in Aptlief and it was so beautiful and peaceful and Jesus still manifested as the man in his dream was there and he said, “I am really alive! This is Aptlief!”

“I thought you had suffered long enough and came to get you,” Jesus said.

His piac was there! His partner in a couple! And they were as young as when they first were married! He had never felt such joy as they hugged and kissed like he had only just met her because she was completely different too.

“Is there anything else I can do for you, Hiiamor?” Jesus asked as he changed into the body he prefers.

“Not a thing, Jesus,” he said. “I have everything I have ever wanted just as I have all my life after I met her.”

He was a god now and his wife was his goddess forever though they were both like Hositma and born by random and nothing like his wife. Jesus joined the Fourth saying, “Until you wrote the end of it, I thought I was going to lose him.”

“That little kid broke the door down. I just followed his logic. If you are really here, you are really here whether you stay or you go somewhere. If you’re alive you are alive anywhere, even in your sleep or death.”

“I see it work but I don’t know how it works,” Jesus said.

“It works the same way,” the Fourth said, “It doesn’t have to be logical or even make sense, it is what it is no matter how many words you throw at it. If you are aware of it, that is what it is. Get it?”

Jesus nodded. “It is what it’s always been even when we made nothing. It is what we do. Thank you, John. You have given me another weapon, my light lights everything that is practical but I am impractical.”

“Did you say that or did God?” The Fourth asked.

“If I answer that I might die,” Jesus said.

“Exactly,” the Fourth replied. “You created life but are you alive?”

“Alive?” Jesus said, “I think I am.”

“So did Same,” the Fourth said and he is no more.

“He’s somewhere,” Jesus said, “Should I bring him back?”

“That my dear God,” I said, “Is up to you,” for I think he is still in me somewhere with all his power and all his impractical notions.

“That is why I asked you,” Jesus said.

“Touche,” I said, “But I think I’m fine the way I am.”

“But he is the Same,” Jesus said.

“I was first,” I said, “He was never the Same. He just said he was. He was insane to go into the paradox. I am left and I am not insane and never was.”

“An insane God?” Jesus said, “Is that even possible?”

“No,” I said, “If you say you are God and you are that is one thing. But if you say you are God and you’re not. You are not. It carries a curse inherently with it.”

“Then you are cursed?” Jesus said.

“No. I don’t believe so. My man said he was God so he is dead. I am God so I am not dead. The same as you Jesus Christ are alive but your man, call him Jesus of Nazareth is not. I doubt you can raise him. I would if you wanted me to,” Isaid.

“Do you think you can?” Jesus asked.

“No,” I said. “But he was a man. He might be able to come back on his own from the abyss anyway.”

“Someday we will raise him this time, you know?” he said.

“We will try,” I said.

“I can do anything,” Jesus said.

I let it lie. 

“You can do anything, Jesus,” I said, submitting after a lot of talk I did not share with you. The Same is scary. He is more powerful than we are. We have to get rid of him or he is just evil enough to destroy us all by mistake and evil always makes a mistake eventually but that includes you whoever or wherever you are. I am on your side and will work with God. I brought him under control and he hid again.”