Fifteenth Church Service of Jeremy

Fifteenth Church Service of Jeremy

Greetings: Greetings from me pastor John of the Church of John. I want to make you all feel welcome.

Announcements: I have an unusual text in my message today. Please comment whether you would like me to do more of it.

Message: Details Are Important

I went out the sliding glass back door and then one the sidewalk to where there is lawn, across the lawn almost having to duck to avoid a broken limb on one of the crabapple trees out onto the blacktopped alley and proceeded to the end of the street. There I made a left and walked on the street to the corner crossing the street to the sidewalk. Then I walked the sidewalk all the way to the restaurant where I went in and sat at the next seat to the corner of the bar. But out on the sidewalk in front of it, Tayler was just leaving with a carryout bag of food in one hand and her keys in the other.

She said in her usual cheery voice,(I really like Tayler.) that I kept missing her and that she was all done for the day. Then as she continued to walk toward her car I said, “Good-bye,” and she did likewise.

When I made it inside a girl asked what I wanted so I ordered a carafe of Diet Coke and they brought me one with a glass filled mostly with ice. There was ice in the carafe that was full of pop. I peeled the paper off my straw with my fingernails making a double tear in its paper wrapper and then sliding the paper off first the top end of the straw, then the bottom half and stuck it in my glass and then sipping my first sip which was a rather large one.

I looked into the kitchen area and saw a girl and thought to Jesus, ‘That’s the pretty girl you say is looking for a rich man.’

‘I said that for an old man like you to get her he would have to be rich,’ he said.

I watched her intently thinking about all the money she spent to look that way. She has a nice shape but she really isn’t that sexy. Her breasts are too small. She is thin and you can easily tell it is something she enjoys doing. Then I noticed she was filling little plastic cups with tartar sauce and said, ‘A lot of good it does her to look pretty doing that job now. What does she do most of the time?’

‘Nothing and there is no one to see her at home so it makes no difference. She likes to work. At least here it makes a difference,’ he said.

‘So,’ I said, ‘What are we going to talk about? I don’t seem to have anything in common with the gods you’ve put in me. How about you introduce me to some of your friends?’

‘Do you want to meet my friends?’ he said, ‘Alright.’ Then he said, ‘Guys this is God.’

‘Hello, God,’ one of them said and I saw his extended hand so I shook hands with him.

‘I hope-are you all doing fine?’ I asked.

‘We always are,’ he replied.

‘Does it get boring?’ I asked

‘It does but it’s better than the alternative,’ he said.

‘The alternative,’ I said while all this time sipping on my first glass of pop, ‘You mean like being miserable? Yes, I suppose it does. I don’t know though, being bored is miserable to me too.’

‘We get used to it,’ he said, ‘It isn’t that bad.’

Then I started talking to Jesus who is God. I don’t remember what I said to him but I eventually realized I was ignoring our guests.

‘Here I am talking to you,’ I said to God, ‘As if no one was around like we always do.” Then turning to his friends I said, ‘Sorry guys.’ But they made no reply. Then we didn’t say anything for a while and drifted off in my own world trying to drink my pop more slowly. Then I didn’t say anything but, “Hi!” to a chunky but pleasantly so waitress who seemed all smiles. She is always so happy it seems and after that I looked around at the few customers there were. But after we had been there a while an older heavy lady came in with two guys I recognized. One of them was pigeon-toed and the other had a fat flabby belly hanging out in the open under his white tee. They went all the way through the restaurant and returned, finally seeing someone who must have been waiting for them in the sunroom.

At some time I went outside for a cigarette and sat on a bench in front of the restaurant when Jesus told me it was good to see me relax because I was so anxious all the time.

‘Yes,’ I said it is good to just relax. ‘I am anxious a lot. How is it in heaven? Is anxiety a big problem?’

‘It can be for some,’ he said.

‘How about depression?’ I asked.

‘We can usually distract them from it,’ was his reply.

To make this long story shorter, when we got home I just sat outside and smoked another cigarette after four or five and three carafes of pop. I realized that nobody knew where I was on earth and even in the Domain of Yeu as well as the wilderness, earth included.

‘It makes me sad,’ I said, ‘When …’

‘It does me too,’ Jesus said, ‘But just think about it. In the end we get them all and they are in me.’

“Please,’ I said, ‘It is such a pleasure to be alive.’

‘Thank you,’ he said, ‘I’m pleased also.’

That was about three hours of my day. I thought you might like to know exactly what I do when I am not writing and going to the restaurant is my favorite thing to do, to get high on caffeine. But I asked Jesus what else he had been doing and he said, ‘It is hard for me to remember. There are so many things I do. But there was a car accident and they found another victim in the collapse of that condo.’ I realized he does dozens of things in heaven all at the same time. Everybody in heaven could if they wanted. It is one of the faculties of God’s consciousness. Even I could here if I wanted but it would make my head swim like it almost does his. 

‘Everything you say fascinates me,’ he said.

‘That is because you love me,” I replied.

Let us pray. Lord Jesus it is always interesting being in you and having you in me. Even the low key things are fascinating. Help us all be so fascinated with you. Because we love you. In the Spirit of Spirits we pray. Amen.