fragments of heartbeats

sometimes all we got left are the fragments of something that might have been, but never was

Did you know that I can tell when you walk into a room. Your scent makes my world spin and I try to fill my lungs with it. If I hold my breath, maybe it would stay with me forever. 

I know that I could never forget you, you’re imprinted on my soul and even if you should disappear the memory of you would keep me going. For a while. 

You laugh and shake your head at something someone said. Your hair dancing about, spreading your scent even more. 

I can hardly resist the urge to reach out and touch you. Pull you to me, bury my face in your hair and just fill myself with you. 

I shiver, the urge grows stronger. Never have I wanted someone as much as I want you. 

Then you turn your head and you look me straight in the eye. My watching you makes you blush and you look away quickly only to glance back a moment later. 

I yearn for you, to hold you, speak to you, have you speak to me. The crowded room pushes us closer together. 

Intoxicating, your scent is intoxicating to me. 

I remember fragments. The beating of my heart, fluttering like a butterfly. So close to me, you were so close; all I had to do was to take one small step. I dared not, could not, would not let you hear my lost heart. Lost because you stole it, stole it the second our eyes met. 

And bleeding because you would never know that you had it. 

The wind blowing my hair over my face, obscuring you from my vision. Through locks of moonlight I only caught glimpses. The curve of your mouth when you smile, a glimmer in your eye when you listen to what the other say. I don’t want to remember your face, but it burns like the sun every time I close my eyes. 

I wish I could fragment my fragments, turn them into dust, for all they do is prolong my misery. 

I keep thinking that all I have to do is laugh loud enough. That all it would take is for you to get one glance, to once look into my eyes and you would be hooked. 

Is it really such an impossible dream, me and you. 

Maybe it’s just a selfish inclination, maybe there is something in me that needs to have you. What if we were to speak to each other, would you find me interesting, pretty, someone you would want to know. For all I know you might not even be nice, but I like to think you are. 

I really don’t know why I chose to live in this fantasy, why I cannot, will not, dare not accept real life. 

I need to believe that you would love me. 

Reviews

[Eloha]

This was more than pleasant! I like the world you choose to live in, your bio and your tone of expression.

[Yheela]

This site is still new to me, can't believe I missed your review.
Thank you. ^_^

[Eloha]

This was my first message to you xD

[Yheela]

lol - life and the understanding of new sites work in mysterious ways ...

[Eloha]

yes I've been calling this site the facebook of poetry, for years.

[pumpkin head]

I enjoyed this, very nicely written

[Yheela]

Thank you!

[Kent Smotherman]

Excellent, excellent piece - it has a very natural, poetically told story. Wonderful phrasing and word choices. The last line is so simple and powerful. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this one.

[Yheela]

Thank you, it was a long road to completion.