Count of Three

this was not a game, nothing like hide and seek

At the count of three

drown the pills

cut the rest, of that creamy white skin

take a bullet to the heart

forever left wondering

if it hit or not?

battle the demons

that haunt your dreams

chained to this world

by responsibilities

so many reasons

for what I did

but to the ears of others

they're just excuses

So, on the count of three

for the second time,

I didn't drown the pills

forgot to the cut the last patch of white skin

the gun locked away,

I needed a way

asphyxiated,

floating

finally....

fading away

Author's Note

I hope you guys like this. Please Review and tell me what you think.

Reviews

Excuse the previous review. Obviously I wasn't feeling right.

"forever left wondering
if it hit or not?"

That part left me wandering in two directions. (If thats possible)...
I love the way this statement is~ controversial? ~ :)

Oh and did I mention the ending is amazing? You've just left me walking into fog. ;)

[Sugar Plum ♥]

Thats so strong, deep and impressed me...Great style! specially i love the end, which makes all conclusions ...

[OceanTropic]

Wow.

This was strong. Very strong.

Not only did I absolutely enjoy every single line of this, the ending shook me. I love how you said the demons are chains to this world, not the other way around. That it's not you who is chained to them, but them who stay in your life for whatever reason. Amazing amazing.

The way you described the death too was so ... I don't know...realistic? I wouldn't know what it's like but it seemed so right to say what you did. Great piece Blossom, keep writing.

[David W Moore III]

Powerful emotional explosion... this piece sits in your gut and calls for attention. nice.

[NoneOfYourBusiness akaK..]

this is a ghostly surreal weaving created with exceptional forethought as to word placement and composition to elicit an immediate and powerful emotional response~ excellent writing !

Excuse the previous review. Obviously I wasn't feeling right.

"forever left wondering
if it hit or not?"

That part left me wandering in two directions. (If thats possible)...
I love the way this statement is~ controversial? ~ :)

Oh and did I mention the ending is amazing? You've just left me walking into fog. ;)

[Aven]

"asphyxiated,
floating
finally....
fading away"

wow... I could really feel the spirit leaving the body at ease... it was one of those feelings like after you've had a huge fight and let off some steam and cried, you feel almost euphoric and liberated. great write!

[manifesto]

This is amazing! I love the contrasting, the do and don't, and I love the meaning you put into an act that others would see as selfish. Like a wise person once said, "Giving up doesn't always mean you are weak, sometimes it just means you're strong enough to let go." Love the poem, really touching, and keep rocking!