Broken Toy

try to fix me... until I am Perfection

Let me fix you
until you're no longer broken
glue back these fragile pieces
that makes you who you are
Beautiful Porcelain doll
let me fix you
to perfection
until my beautiful porcelain doll
is no longer a broken toy
Beautiful Porcelain doll
let me fix you
until you are perfection

Author's Note

Please Review. Please tell me how to improve.

Reviews

[Matthew Kult]

Hello Blossom,

The best way to improve is to keep writing and allow ourselves to evolve. You have a great piece here. If you wanted to expand on this poem, go into depths of how it was broke....Make us feel the porcelain doll is yourself or even your soul that was destroyed by....fill in the blank. But you don't need to as it is, it's a great piece.

Regards,

Matthew

[silentsmiles]

i really liked this actually but i agree with SaimaS but a little bit more into it i think you could really make this amazing

:> cute! i think u should elaborate on feeling. other than that great!