Dreams

Blech? A blerb.

I will be where the clouds breathe air into my lungs,

And the blue skies melt into the fiery horizons.

I will calm my heart beat with the warm salty air,

Born from the silver waters that mother a million.

I will bury my mortality in the velvet sand,

And remain immortal in the whispering waves.

I will make a name for myself and carve it in the wet cliff sides,

And my voice will ring with the clouds for eternity.

I will watch the burning embers sink into the ocean,

And then blink back at the shimmering skies.

I will bathe myself under the flawless moon of silky cream,

Like the skin of a wanton lover at the peak of her infidelity.

I will be where the wispy clouds melt into dreams,

And the satin skies rob me of my sanity.

Author's Note

Let me know what you think.

Reviews

[Mike Espinosa]

This is a good poem. Your imagery is very good. and your simile at the end was fantastic. Only a few stylistic problems.

"Heart beat" should be one word.

"I will make a name for myself and carve it in the wet cliff sides," doesn't need a comma for this context. Really, any line that has a comma before "And" probably doesn't need a comma. They don't seem to be complex-enough statements to necessitate a comma.

Very good job.

[Iota]

Bathe myself under the flawless moon of silky cream, yes this is very lovely and sensual, love that line there. Excellent poetry my friend well done.

[PadfootBlack]

Faved! This is a beautiful piece, the words are rich and should be savored.... lovely descriptive language. Great job!