Farewell, My Dear Sweet Ruin

Dear Sweet Ruin, you drive me so insane. I want you, yet cannot have you. You will only lead to my end. And I could possibly lead only to yours.

 

Dear Sweet Ruin,

 

            I see you have returned today. Have come back to drive me to the point of insanity this time?

            You love it don’t you when you see that wild look in my eyes? You love to see me squirm to resist the temptation of reaching out and capturing your luscious lips. Or when I stare at you, the lust evident, yet you pretend to not know it.

            You know I can’t touch you, for if I do it will surely ruin me, and perhaps even you in the process.

           

Farewell,

AJ

           

Oh Dear Sweet Ruin,

 

            How much I want to take you into my arms right now. You’re right in front of me, your strawberry scented shampoo wafting in my direction. You really are a tease aren’t you? You know how much that scent intoxicates me.

            And how much I love to see you in your blue shirt. It’s a change from your dark colors, and it looks really nice on you. My fingers are itching to grasp those buttons and undo them one by one.

            Now that I think about it, I actually rather like you without blue.

            Without anything preferably.

 

Farewell,

AJ

 

My Dear Sweet Ruin,

 

            You continue to both surprise, and enrapture, me. Your voice is like beautiful tinkering bells and has such powerful charisma and characteristics. It showed me the real you today. I was also positively entranced in you, but then again I always am.

            It was by some other-worldly miracle that I happened to stumble upon you early in the morning. Do you know that you look lovely in the rising sun? Even a sunrise’s beauty is nothing compared to you.

            Your beauty, both inner and outer, is beyond everything in fact.

 

Farewell,

AJ

 

Sweet Ruin,

 

            Just when I thought that a break from you would do me some good, you appear on my doorstep. Why are you here?

            You and I both know how wrong this is. And yes, while I want you, crave you, need you, I cannot.

            You should know this as well, yet you come to my doorstep, with those lost eyes. What else can I do?

            You know how much it drains me when I try to avoid you? Yet you attach yourself to me like a newborn with its mother. You know how much self-control it takes me to not respond to your seemingly innocent touches?         

            You think I do not see the wanting in your eyes? It is a mirror image of my own eyes every time I look upon you.

            Oh god, how much it hurts. Here you are, where I can have you, yet it can not be.

            So don’t tempt me with those affectionate touches of yours, those looks, or those invitations in your voice. If you keep this up…

            …I don’t have to be physic to know what will happen, dear ruin.

 

Farewell,

AJ

 

Dear Sweet Ruin,

 

            Yes, I am being terribly rude by not saying goodbye to you, but I have no time. For if I stay here anymore with you, I am sure I will never be able to walk away and that will only lead to both mine and your demise.

            So I hope you have it in your heart to forgive me, my dear sweet ruin, because I have just done the most unforgivable sin against you.

            Be assured I will never forget you. As if I can.

            Your warm, gentle touch is permanently embedded into my body, and I can still feel where your lips touched. And even if you come to forget me, you will never leave me.

            You will always be lingering here, and I’m afraid I may already be too late to save myself.

            However, the least I could do is save your sanity.

            So do not try to find me, because you never will. Hopefully to you this will just be a dream.

            To me though, it’ll be a weight in my heart that will always pull me down.

            And even though you will never read this, or the other letters enclosed, just let me say…

           

Farewell, My Dear Sweet Ruin

 

Sincerely,

Anna Jenson

Author's Note

Um, for those who didn't pick it up: Yes, it is TWO GIRLS. My first story with a same sex pairing. I enjoyed exploring it and trying to write it out. :)

Reviews

[Nita]

Oooh, me liked this! It was good (and yes, I picked up on it.) Very good.