Bound by Forever (1)

I never thought that leaving behind all I ever knew and loved would have such an impact on my life. But, I quess things happen for a reason. And she is my reason...She is the only light that shined in my life after I left. But I destroyed her life through my pitiful selfishness. Even though I gave her her worst nightmare, she stayed with me and continued to love me. How can a person by the wonderful and amazing? How?

 

"Aydean, Get down her please!"

I flicked my ear and dropped a large hunk of bloody deer onto the soft earth. I looked towards Scott-who also had a mouthful of deer-and cocked my head to the side. 

Go ahead Aydean, I'll tell Derek, Scott growled. His brown fur was standing on end, indicating that he had smelled another deer.

Finish that one first. Then get another one! I scolded, rubbing my crimson stained muzzle into the dirt, attempting to wipe off the blood.

Yes mommy, I'm sorry! he whimpered.  

Mockery only makes you stupider.

So what's your excuse?

"AYDEAN! Please, I need to talk to you!"

Thanks, dude. See ya later!

See ya, Aydean! Tell mother I said hi! 

I rolled my eyes and darted through the dark forest. Scott was such an impeccable retard that it hurt me to know him. Of course, I was rather amazed at how far he had made it into life being as stupid as he was. Yet, we was still my best friend and I could not deny him that. But still, he knows that I cannot tell my mother. first, besause she doesn't know about me being a wolf. Second, she thinks I am in my room studying. I continued to run towards the sound of mother's voice-which was over a good fifteen miles away. Thank the heavens for super hearing. I skidded to a stop in front of the two story window that was centered above me. With a quick swish of my tail I leaped onto the sill and collapsed to the floor. The moment my skin impacted with soft carpet, I shifted back into my human state. I rubbed my head-which was always sore after transforming- and grabbed a pair of clothes from my dresser.

Still massaging my temple-which housed my insufreable headache-I stumbled downstairs into the kitchen. My mother was sitting at the dining table with my father's hand on her shoulder. They both had a very uncomfortable look painted on their faces. I knew this was not going to be good.
"Aydean, my son,  sit down. Your father and I have something to tell you," my moter sighed, looking at her shoe.

"What is it mother?" I asked, swallowing hard. She looked at me with pain filled eyes.

"Aydean, please don't hate us, but this is for the best," my father said, his voice hard and firm. I knew what was coming. There was no denying the awful truth. We were going to be...
 

Author's Note

there may be some slight errors, but please, i beg of you, try to look past them.

Reviews

[Political Punk ~~ CBD]

like the characters, like the detail, like the flow. Very well done

[The Lit Wit]

Your writing certainly has a unique tone towards characters, but I think you've got mostly raw potential here that definitely could be stepped up to the next level with much tweaking. I'd first suggest evaluating your first person, it's hard to do and few pull it off without extensive practice.
Also, your opening seemed like a typical hook. It's used so commonly that it doesn't draw people in anymore. For example, you wrote, "I never thought that leaving behind all I ever knew and loved would have such an impact on my life." This strikes me as a long sentence, which can be awkward to start any story. Maybe something along the lines of: "I was her nightmare. I killed myself for her... but I also killed her for me. That's why I left it all behind." Something like this, though worded better of course. Also, the vagueness of this opening example needs some specifics, like, what did he leave behind exactly? Did he move? And it doesn't flow very well together.
My next concern is that you jumped in the story from the last paragraph of "How can a person by the wonderful and amazing�How?" To " 'Aydean, Get down her please!" (I'm assuming you mean, "Aydean, get down here please!") This jump confuses me. One minute, he's talking to the reader, the next we are thrown into a dialogue and don't know who's speaking, or where, or when. And then suddenly a conversation occurs in italics between characters I don't know. Needs some formatting and clarity. But I did enjoy the diction of your prose. And, as I've said, you've got a hell of a lot of potential. This is all I have to say for now, so good job! Good luck,
Melinda

[Holly]

Freakin' awesome dude! I'm so glad I can finally read this. Much anticipated. MHAA!

[Tina Kline]

A great piece of writing. It captured my interst.


Tina

Tina