Tales of Gold

a story of wealth and greed

A stream he had found, while wandering around

Through miles of mountain trails

Broken and sore, from looking for

That big strike where he’d prevail,

 

Years and years he had endeavored

With just a trace now and then to show

He had dipped his pan, across the land

Everywhere that he would go,

 

He knew what signs to look for

He had struck it rich before

But money earned, is quickly burned

From a wealthy man, now he was poor,

 

So about to cash in his chips

He sat down on the bank of a stream

Bending over to drink, he could scarcely think

Of what was causing that shimmering gleam,

 

The sun shown bright and clearly

Through the sparkling little creek

He dug his hand, into the sand

Would this finally be his lucky streak,

 

He slowly pulled out his fist

And opened it up to see

Well he just stared, at the nuggets there

How much dough could there really be,

 

He worked day in and day out

Pulling his treasure from the sand

From big to small, he gathered it all

He’d be the richest man in the land,

 

But greed seemed to take control

While filling his bags with all they could hold

Then he loaded his pack, threw it over his back

Slipped and fell from the weight of the gold,

 

A stream I found, while wandering around

In the hills near my mountain home

When to my surprise, right before my eyes

A tattered old pack….. on a pile of bones.

Reviews

[Ern M. Yoshimoto]

a very powerful narrative. it is a telling morality tale about our search for material wealth, which never ends in a good place. following this one man we see the story play out. here he is, surrounded by beautiful nauture, yet all he can think about is wht he can extract out of it. that said, he is a rather symapthetic tragic hero. who doesn't want to strike it rich? a part of me hoped he would succeed. yet glory is always short-lived.
the consistent rhymes was also impressive. if we add music to it, the tone could completely change. is this a blues or more upbeat like waltzing matilda? but the story at the heart of this ensures it is a strong work no matter how it's sung.

[Trace]

Thank you so very much for your wonderful comments and compliments on this piece, l like telling stories in poetry.
Trace

[Briana O'Connor]

I love this little tale spun so elegantly. There is great message depicted within, which gives the poem a great impact. Nicely penned. Thank you for sharing.

[Trace]

I am so glad you enjoyed my little story.
Thank you for your wonderful compliments.

Trace

[Roland Petrov]

A great story and a lovely poem. It's beautifully written and very entertaining. Together with the lovely picture, it's golden package. A big thumbs up from me for this one.

[Trace]

Thank you so very much for your wonderful comments and compliments on my poem.

Trace.

[wordman]

a great story trace,was the gold still in the bag lol
greed will always bring you down

[Trace]

Great question to ponder.
I left that up to the reader to consider.

Thanks for reading and commenting on my writing.

Trace.

[wordman]

you are welcome,he got it

[Trace]

In reading the last verse
You get to see that the story teller becomes the "Lucky" one.
"ME"