Will Lu Have my Back?

I wanted the prize so badly. I tried all I could to get away with it. And when i got caught, obviously the only person i could blame was the devil himself.

I snuck down the stairs of the small, run down house. They were old, and they always creaked if you weren’t careful, but I had learned the tricks over the years. I could make it down the stairs in ten seconds flat without making a sound. That night was even more important than ever to be quiet. I was on a mission. If I wasn’t careful, I would wake him and my quest would be for nothing. And the prize I was seeking was so amazing, I might die if I didn’t win it.

I made it down the stairs with out a hitch. The hall was easy to traverse, my fluffy mouse socks padding gently against the wooden floor. I reached the kitchen without making a sound. I moved slowly to the counter, eyeing my treasure in the darkness. The moon was bright that night, thank god, so I didn’t need to turn on the lights, not that I would have anyways. Stealth was the most important tool on this quest.

The treasure was so close I could practically taste it. I grabbed the lid and gently, oh so gently, lifted the owl’s head from it’s ceramic body. I could smell the prize now, in all its glory. Dozens of wonderfully round, perfectly cooked peanut butter chocolate chip cookies sat in the bottom of our cookie jar, just waiting to be enjoyed. Scarlett had baked them that afternoon, but they were for a charity fundraiser and she wouldn’t let us have even one. But I’d be damned if I was going to let an opportunity for her famously delicious cookies. I reached into the jar, snatching one of those glorious cookies and shoving it fiendishly into my mouth. It tasted like heaven. I sighed and chewed slowly, letting the taste fill my mouth. Nothing would ever taste as good as Scarlett’s cookies. I don’t know how I had ever lived without them.

As I reached into the jar to grab another, the lights flicked on. I froze. I hoped that maybe, if I just stood still she wouldn’t see me. I was wrong.

“Abigail Jackson! I told you not to touch my cookies! Those are for the bake sale!” I looked at Scarlett sheepishly. Although she was a tiny human, clocking in at barely five foot, she was terrifying when she was angry. Her face would contort into a vicious snarl and she would hold herself as if she towered over you. It was the exact thing she was doing to me right then. “Why on earth did you think you would get away with this?”

I panicked. I had no excuse, no explanation, so I said the first thing that came to my mind. “The devil made me do it.”

Scarlett’s face scrunched even more, still overwhelmingly angry, but now with a hint of analysis. She was trying to figure out if I was telling the truth. Finally, she opened her mouth and shouted, “Lucifer get your a*s down here!”

I cringed. Lu was going to kill me for this. But he was a smooth talker, much more smooth than me, and maybe he would find us a way out of this. At the very least, he would out up a better effort than I would.

Satan stumbled noisily down the stairs, tiredness still dragging down his muscles and clouding his eyes. His jet black hair was messy and tousled, but somehow still looked gorgeous. “Wha?” he mumbled as he blinked the sleep from his eyes. When he finally made it to the kitchen and noticed Scarlett’s angry posture, he blanched. Although he was over six foot, and towered over tiny Scar, he seemed completely terrified she would kick his a*s. And poor Lu didn’t even know why Scar was mad at him. “Woah Scarlett, why you so angry?”

“Abby here, says you told her to get you both some of my bake sale cookies.” She turned her glare from me, to him, back to me again. The vein in her forehead was throbbing so hard I was worried it was about to pop. Not that that would stop her from trying to kill us both to protect her precious cookies.

The devil looked towards me, his perfect lips pulling into a pout. “Abby why would you say that?” For the leader of the underworld, he was such a whiner. Then he turned back to Scarlett. “I would never do that to you, or the Cookies for Crafts bake sale. I know how important that program is to you.” I scowled at Lu. The little rat.

Scarlett’s face softened. She could hear the earnestness in his voice. Lucifer was a magnificent liar, but he never lied to her. There was something about the small human that had earned the King of Hell’s undying respect. Me and Satan were real bros, but he would never betray Scarlett to help me. The b*****d.

Lu looked back to me and scolded, “Abs, how could you do that to her? You know the cookies are for a good cause, what would possess you to try and steal them?” He sounded so disappointed

I scowled at the ground. Satan was always so high and mighty when it came to protecting Scarlett. Anything I did that made Scarlett mad, no matter how small, always made Satan disappointed in me. We used to follow the rule bros before hoes, but that never held true when it came to Scarlett, and they weren’t even dating. Damn Lucifer and his damn puppy crush. “I dunno,” I mumble, trying to contain my anger. “I just wanted to have some of the cookies. They’re so good, and you know how much I love them.” I knew it was the thing to soften Scarlett. She loved when people complimented her baking.

She looked at me with a softened posture. I could tell she was about to forgive me, no thanks to Lu. Scarlett let out a long sigh, then finally said, “I forgive you Abby. Just please, don’t steal them again, They’re to help the children.”

I shuffled past them without a word, head down. I wanted to return to my room, hoping they wouldn’t hold this over my head for very long. I was half way up the stairs when Satan cleared his throat. Pausing in my slow climb, I looked at him with raised eyebrows. “I didn’t hear an apology, Abby.” The goddamn b*****d.

“I’m sorry, Scarlett,” I mumbled, with a glare aimed directly at Lu. He was going to pay for this.

I retreated grumpily up the stairs, but not before I heard Scarlett say, “Thanks Lu, you’re my hero,” and Satan, the King of Demons, respond, “Anything for someone like you.”

The damn lovesick puppy.

Author's Note

I hope it was at least a little funny. I tried but I don't normally write things for humor.