Mind

I became use to being left and deserted i guess reason being, my mom and my father were strangers to me and i ended up with issues deeper than the average plot.Stuck, this unprotected trap for those with a open heart and a closed mind. Love is not a thinking game but a feeling game;what ive learned so far through the ups and downs. I find my self to be alone though surrounded by thousands of people almost,it seems.Alone with my nightmares and phobias which kept away from happiness and brought sufferring like a swift wind.Instead of reaching for my inner boyfriend or inner brother or inner friend, i found my hand clenched on being what others figured me to be,a gansta,a*****e,thug, and still i can remember each word and how i felt each and every time.I use to go from that day on to forever or so i thought many of times and now when i finally reached for something that was so old to be the newest thing in my life,being able to love for time after time and so on.Things inevitably change and though we fight and stand our ground in times of loving the same, we as humans have to under stand that change comes and with change comes your need to change with it,there are no choices in the dark because with change you never truely know.I may be proud to laugh each and every day but i pray to god each night to hold my tears behind my lids because it hurts to cry.I glance at my reflection every where i go wether its in yesterdays puddle or the mirrors of the television or store fronts, i see who i want to be and who i am to become.Ive gone from being a boy to being shot with a little maturity and my sickness of a child would become the sickness of a young man.Though i lost my bestfriend;well one of my few,i still remmebr the good times and i know that those times,where smiling was the only option to choose for how we felt.Time is married to change and their kids are happiness and pain.pain, being what the results may be and happiness being,if you adapt to change and let the past remain as,the past then,that will be the result.I have no worries to re-enter the presences of you or any of the past changes in my life because i know deep down inside, that the who i am today,will not be the who i am tomorrow and who i am tomorrow will not be the me in the futures.My focus is at its final phase, and that is to see the simple things in life and let the more complicated things work itself out.I see differently now, as if better life prescribed contacts and all im left to see is all there is beautiful in the world.What was then, is all,just all; finally over; the breakups and make ups though when you cry,your face then looks the same.I see and i am over the mountains and over your time well built,fortress, im finally out.I now lay my lips on the future and today i hold on to my dreams and i hold on to my reality.Today i chose to never let go of my future because as warm as her heart is, i know forever the light will shine bright.

 

P.S.

Keep your eyes on tarnished gold because when she thinks so,you expalin her amount in wealth.Help those in need of love and those who lose their minds in life and all its troubles, just lend a hand and tell the person just keep on pushing.