The Women in My Family are Strong

                      The women in my family are strong. We don't put up with made up excuses and lies. We remove ourselves from conflicted situations. My mom actually removed herself, my brother and I from her mothers side of the family. Of course my aunt followed her. Like I said I grew up around strong women. I didn't have one mom like the average kid. I had two, my mom and my aunt. They were a team. Yes, I had my dad in the picture but I realized how lucky I was to have two mother figures.

                      The problem with a family of strong women is what happens when they all get together. That's what happened with my moms side of the family. Some were stubborn and thought they were more important in some way. That's why I never had the chance to know my memere. My grandmother died before I was born, so knowing her mother was a wish I was not granted. My great aunt was stuck up and all but pushed me and my mom out of the picture. I grew up thinking Memere hated me for some unknown reason. When she died, I found out the truth. She has alzheimers and her daughter took care of her, knowing she could take whatever she wanted from her.

                       I think it's funny that the family fued is still going on. I have four great aunts and uncles and the aunts love to fight. They're both in their seventies and they still send hate mail to eachother. One will write a letter and the other will rip it up, buy a stamp and send it back. To actually waste money to show your own sister how much you despise her seems pretty crazy. You'd think they'd bury the hatchet now that their mother has passed but they are still going strong. Strong, stubborn Gouin women. It's a blessing and a curse.

                      The only problem is our tempers. When we get angry at someone, we can't hold it together. Our temper is our weak spot. We can't man up and yell, we cry. It's ridiculous when you're trying to seem tough and confident. When my dad left us, it really showed how strong we all were. We didn't cry because we were sad. We cried because we were furious. My aunt came up to me a week after we all found out, hugged me and whispered in my ear. She said, "We'll get through this like we always do. We're strong.". As she said this I could only imagine how her brain was thinking to threaten or hurt him six ways to Sunday.

                      I guess the point I'm trying to get across is I was raised to know I was strong and independent. The women in my family taught me that. I realized a new expectation for myself. If I fall in love someday, it will be on my terms. No one's whispered promises and confessions will sway me easily. My parents got married after three months of dating, not a safe choice looking back. I'll make sure I'm certain that I'm safe with whoever I marry, years down the road.  That man will be one with good intentions and treats me right. I won't be that man's second choice, always his first. The women in my family are strong, I hope I turn out exactly like them.