~ Teardrops from the Universe

~ Some metaphors can be deeper than you think.

~ Teardrops from the Universe

 

 

Shadows dancing on clear water

From above is every cloud

As a deeper thought

Reflected into the deep azure,

White bottoms of sand

Everything is fluid,

The smell of Ozone

Reflection of the sky

But thoughts drown

As the crying sky,

Opens her heart

And can't be healed

Where tears from the universe

Deepening the mass

As there is no ending

Nor a beginning

It shall just be left right there

To be...

 

~ Elisa Laura

Author's Note

Thank you xx

Reviews

[sithlordjp]

"Reflected", "Reflection" of things seen, of things... unseen. The reflection seems to be more internal in this piece. Aftet all, can't the universe be defined from the infinite large to the infinite small? Funny how visual stimulation can trigger such deep emotions, questions. "The smell of Ozone", as a strange electricity connecting us with the rest of the world... Are we all one, or alone? I too reach the conclusion of your words and wonder: "It shall just be left right there/ To be..." Very powerful writing Elisa, you express so much, just beautiful.. Thank you for sharing with us.

What a nice review, again :) happy to read this... thank you very much !!! :)

[sharonlee]

Moving and deeply symbolic... like the heavens weeping for humanitys sins.

[L. J. Clayton]

A beautifully spiritual and earthly offering with a wonderful depth of thought. Lovely imagery throughout, it's hard to choose a favourite line, but this one edges out just a little bit further than the rest...'As the crying sky, Opens her heart And can't be healed'

Thank you for sharing.

Laurie

[Shin ( formerly known a..]

You are very beautiful.

[Morning Star]

there is so much love and beauty in the universe
when it rains, I always feel that,they are the teardrops of Jesus
And if you stand in the rain the teardrops from the universe
Will cleanse and heal a broken heart and cleanse the soul
I enjoy reading your words
Excellent piece of art

[Layla J Omorose]

The imagery of this poem is very beautiful even though the poem speaks of pain and sorrow. There is still a beauty in the tears of the universe. Good work

[Muse]

The music just adds to the aroma of gorgeousness!

Everything is fluid,

The smell of Ozone

Reflection of the sky

Thoughts drowning in a crying sky. It's a vision of whimsical sadness. You amaze me once again with your consistenc vision of meloncholy beauty.

[外人 (Gaiji..]

i'm shivering right now !! Amazing poem, great idea to put this song as a soundtrack to it, they fit perfectly ! I'm just speechless :)

[Extant]

We are killing our mother and she cries, but she loves us too much to protest.
Shadows like the bruising on human skin, and clouds floating through veins we can not imagine.

[ghost writer]

you always create wonderous imagery in your poetry. Using the sky and water to reflect your moods is beautiful. Both create an illusion in each other..the sea gives the sky its colour..the enormity of these things is truly epic

[Empirik]

A natural function of the ecosystem in life and us all as we grow older. "Where tears of the universe...deepening the mass." Beautiful composure and voice! (with the music) Wow! Magnific! I felt it's every word plus I was overwhelmed by the expansion quality of each stanza or two. It was incredible as each little part is specific enough to feel related, but on the same hand all those little parts can beautifully paraphrase and establish a metaphor (rainy season) for some larger more personal long-standing weight. I loved every part so full of sorrowful depth and true understanding! This is amazing! Wonderful write short and to the core! You have the gift of quill! X :)