~ Soft Whispers

~ Soft Whispers, Elisa Laura, Dark, Fantasy, Ambient, Dreams, Dream Visions, Night Walks

~ Soft Whispers

 

 

Soft sounds,

Rippling, like fingers

On a table

 

Long pauses, silence…

Returning rhythms,

The whirl of thoughts

 

Of you in me...

 

I hear you for years,

In nights, like these

 

Before the moon is full,

Do you want 

           To tell me something?

 

“Tell it to me,

            Say it!”

Stop whispering…!

 

You can trust me,

The sea is ours

 

And I was there for centuries,

But your name was the future,

 

Like a mirror of the ocean,

 

Now we will never be

Together, my own soul,

 

My previous life...

 

 

~ Elisa Laura

Author's Note

Reviews

[Robert Tusitala O'Neill]

I love the vastness of this poem. It uses references to such a wide expanse as a backdrop and it really is a benefit to what I am feeling that you are meaning. The contrast between vast and specific, centuries of time and things that happen in a moment...the wide expanse of the sea and the specificity of fingers tapping on a table, it all adds to the feeling of the depths of this emotion. You have made me realize something about writing; I need to take an idea from music and use it in my poetry. In musical recordings there is something they call the "Pad" in the background. It is not an instrument. Instead it is the collective "background noise" which the producer/sound engineer has built into a feeling. The Pad includes the echo of a wide opened room, or the immediacy of the feeling the singer is right there in bed with you. All these feelings are part of it. If you hear a seagull just for as second in a song, then you immediately think of that song as taking place at the beach. In the case of this poem, the clever "pad" you set down of vast time depth and wide ranges of distance really supported the themes well.

Truly Ro, such a great review from you my friend, not only do you seem to understand my subconscious, but also, the facts of "lucidity". I think you exactly felt here too. (that's a great combination), and I am truly happy you did. Many thanks these are reviews, I hope for, and will dig your words truly! - Elisa

[Robert Tusitala O'Neill]

Many thanks for your excavations, and may you dig up great treasures, from one archaeologist to another!

You're welcome, I've learnt much today from your point of view. And what a wonderful inspiring words here... may you too!! ;)

[Eric Pudalov]

Robby, I appreciate this review as well! That concept of the "pad" is something I haven't necessarily applied to my poetry before, and yet it seems so important. I remember reading an interview with John Paul Jones of Led Zeppelin, and he was talking about the song "Going to California," saying it "sounds like lawn sitting." I think that's part of what you're talking about; the "pad" built into the song gave it the overall feel of someone playing guitar and singing out on a grassy lawn.

Thank you for replying to this......

[Robert Tusitala O'Neill]

I totally agree about Led Zeppelin! This is just what I am talking about!!! It really is possible to do this in poetry. It takes a clear idea of how to lend a feeling to something, but with the smallest of allusions!

[Eric Pudalov]

You know, I may have done it in my poetry without realizing it - I didn't know there was an actual term for it. But I think that creating an "environment," if you will, is part of good storytelling. Perhaps in the next poem that I write/publish on here, I'll keep that in mind.

[Robert Tusitala O'Neill]

It is something I notice that good writers can do, but other writers really can't. It is the art of creating an environment, but then only barely alluding to it. A good writer can give you the barest details, but you still can fill in the rest for yourself. It is a unique ability and I don't know what the word is for it, but it is a way of showing without really even needing to give the details. You have to sense your audience so well that they don't even know what you are slipping into their minds.

[Eric Pudalov]

We had studied something like that in a poetry workshop I took. We did a lesson called "overstatement/understatement," and I decided to go with understatement. I wrote a poem about rape, but never explicitly stated that it was about rape...I just described the feelings between the man and the woman. I think that's what you're talking about, if I'm not mistaken?!

[Robert Tusitala O'Neill]

That IS what I am talking about! Brilliant use of understatement!! It allows the audience to participate when you leave things out but trust them to fill in the gap!

[ron]

Wonderfully romantic. I love it.

Thank you very much Ron, it's nice to see you here :)

[ron]

You are very much welcome Elisa. It is nice to see you here to

Aw thanks again! :) I subscribed to you, so I will catch up on your writings too!

[ron]

You are most welcome.

[Robbie~xoxo~]

Oh my!...How did I miss this one, Sis?....
Such an eerie haunting with your dreams.... I felt the struggle of an entity... one that scratches the inner walls of your darkest psyche...

You kept my mind reeling as I read this...as the ending left open to a portal of another life...WOW!

Magnetic write, Eli... BRAVO!!~xoxo~:)

Yes, thank you Sis! you are the first who finds it eerie, it was eerie. But beautiful. You always know me well love. Thank you so much my Sunshine xoxo :) your words mean the world to me!

[Robbie~xoxo~]

Your writes are always beautiful, Sis... this one was felt deeper into the sea of dreams... for me this is more of a spiritual passage or refection...I found so many layers to peel...it's enchanting! ~xoxo~

Thank you so much lovely. I think you're right, maybe it was... I'm experimenting with this lately. xx much love to you hon!

[Gypsy Warrior Queen]

The all knowing eye....the whispers....needing focus and clarity in self....amazing! Thank-you!

Thank you so much dear Queenie, your words mean much to me! xo

[icelandicblue]

This is simply and unequivocally gorgeous. It is hypnotic as the voice of the poem spoke I listened raptly:

You can trust me,

The sea is ours

And I was there for centuries,

But your name was the future,

Just beautiful Elisa...just beautiful.

Thank you my friend, for your beautiful review. Made my day xx

[Vidya Bacchus]

This is so beautiful and heartfelt.The images are so vivid.I see it all, I feel it all:)

Thank you dearly Vista... :)

Sorry on my phone.... Vidya... ofcourse....

[Vidya Bacchus]

Hahaha you are welcome :)

Haha, thank you, this phone does automatically correct things, and made your beautiful name, like Windows Vista lol xx

[Vidya Bacchus]

LOL..........:)

[L.L. Lily]

Love the structure of your writing, poems dont have to rhyme and this basically reveals your thoughts thanks for sharing it. My fave line is "of you and me" and "you can trust me" it just stands out :P

Thank you very much Lily :)

[L.L. Lily]

No prob :) but my name isn't really lily, lol. :) anyway have a great day!

Oh, what's your name then? so I never mistake again ;) have a great day too, many thanks again.

[L.L. Lily]

Sorry about that getting ready for school. My name janine :)

No worries, thanks for telling me, nice to meet you Janine :)

[Tate Morgan]

While this may black and white to you It is not to me. Though it touches my thoughts and feelings It doesnt explain your own to me. A dream a dream is what it is for me

Hi Taters, oh thank you dear one, for your review, I appreciate your thoughts, was on your page tonight, but couldn't post you a thing... weird HTML... xo

[Tate Morgan]

lol well i am just getting my leggs back under me for writing thank you

hahaha... take the time my friend lol

[Calissa Knox]

My favorite stanza is,
"You can trust me,
The sea is ours".

This is a mysterious, haunting and beautiful poem! I could feel the emotion all the way through.
I absolutely love reading your poetry; it has a unique quality, and beauty that no other poetry has. It grabs onto the depths of the soul. You have a way with words. You tell a clear story, and paint a vivid picture, yet your poetry has a lot of mystique. This poem really spoke to me, Elisa. Thank you!

Thank you so much dear one, for this great and encouriging review. :) I'm ever so glad you liked this one, and you make me blush to say it has a unique quality, that makes me blush, and smile, that was the intention, (it was another dream of me)... thanks again :)

[Calissa Knox]

You're welcome, Elisa. I truly meant that. :) Hope you're having a great day.

That's truly felt by me, darlin, I know when you say something you mean it.... it's 1:30 AM here, and have a night-shift... so will be up for a while... all goes well, hope you have a great day too :)

[Calissa Knox]

Thank you, Elisa. :)

My pleasure, and thank you dear friend :) always! for your wonderful reviews...