~ To Wait a Lifetime

~ To Wait a Lifetime, E.L. Elisa Laura, Life, Questions, Fictional, Fictive, Lyrics, Music, Road Spirit, Poetry in free style, Trains

 

~ To Wait a Lifetime

There in neat thought patterns

Driven by society

Not listening

To your true heart

Feelings ignored from the start,

Where you are caught up in?

A web of self lies?

Knowing what you really want,

But  enforced priorities howl

As hungry wolves, in the center

Of your soul to growl…

Your emotional sensitive side

Just being run over by

The metal of the drive

Then, to wait a lifetime

For that train to come

Makes us terribly mortal

 

~ Elisa Laura

 

 

 

Author's Note

Thank you xx

Reviews

[Reeti]

There is a sense of viciousness over excessive social obligations thrown on our shoulders. No wonder we are disoriented. How ludicrous it is that we may have had or still have prodigal experiences! We become interminable slaves to what others want. Your verse helps me to realize this pitiable fact. Personally, when i am to listen to someone else's pressing advice over what i should do with my life, there do seem to be 'howling of hungry wolves in the center of my soul to growl'. I become restless and perturbed as what the verse depicts. I'd also like to point out that the alliterative effect on reading it is pleasing to the ears.

Aaah Reeti, dear, thank you so much for this utterly beautiful review, so shooting, to the core!!!!! :)

[sharonlee]

There are many (specially myself) not suited to the blueprint, the rules, governed by society... the preconceived boxes we are suppose to fit neatly into.

I have always felt like an alien, an anomaly... living far from a home I don't know how to find.

I enjoyed this Elisa... wishing you health and happiness

And i love you for that my dear Sharonlee.... Thank you so much for this beautiful review, health and happiness to you too xx

[Pollai]

Loved it. The vocabulary is great, you allude to so many things yet never compromise the flow. Good one :)

Grazie Pollai x

[Subrat]

You know it somehow connects with each individual who sacrifices every passion in order to fullfill the demands of this materialistic world. What to say?? This is an amazing piece to be saved.

Thank you so much Subrat, for being here, :) and your fantastic words.

[Subrat]

ooh thanks

:)

[RedInk524]

So terribly true... We focus so much on what society expects of us that we forget and neglect what is expected from the inside. You must never forget yourself! To mindlessly follow the pointing fingers of the people around you makes you no different from some animal following the bellwether into the slaughterhouse like the rest of the herd. You have one life, don't waste it living the life of another. Only a fool will wait at a bus stop when they have a car of their own ready to go. The only change that will ever come a to a person inside is from them self. It is simply the matter of asking "why?" and attempting to answer it. Why must i do this, and this, and that? What do i want to do? Why? With that, you can escape this masquerade and achieve so much. I would much rather hate a person for being who they are, than to love a person for being who they are not. Favoriting this, because i really like it.

How do I love your brilliant brain, my friend. You're one of a kind among many... you point it out very clearly here, with lovely examples of how I tried to bring this over... you're connected to me, for sure. Thanks a lot feel honored to have your words by, and thank you for favoriting my piece... tomorrow I re-read the many beautiful art on your page, and give my best... :) can't wait. - Elisa X

[RedInk524]

Your brain has much more beauty. I simply like to observe. :P

:P, haha, no way!!! I like to observe best :D:D

And YOU :)

[Sugar Plum ♥]

I can`t express how much EXACTLY the same I feel, but you express it here in wonderful way, dear Eli! sociaty is nothing but net of patters, which caught us all in a lie of what we "should" do finally forgeting our hearts, our true self and emotions...I`m not in this way and never can be, as I need to remember immortality..You wrote it so beautifully!
{nia}
02.04.13

True true... I'm not either in this way... you understand the essence always m'dear :) thank you x

[CreativeStroke]

I love your style of writing! You have an old soul and an enchanting elegance to your writing. It gives me a calmness and a peace when I read through your work.
This piece was particularly special to me because I can relate to it very well. Believing lies that just aren't true, holding you back from something that you could become. Beautiful job Elisa!
This easily gets a 100/100 from me!

Thank you so very much for this beautiful review... I will come back in a while for you ;) this made my day!!!

[CreativeStroke]

I'm so glad I made your day! :)

Yes you did... :))) so happy with you around!

[Jack...]

We often stand on this dark lonely platform awaiting the arrival of that particular train that will hopelly oblige are desired travel route only to find much time later that the words "re-directed" or even worse, "cancelled" are now posted on the schedule board.

Elisa, your mind dances and sings the most beautiful words even if they welcome us upon glistened teardrops. Gifted you are and gifted I have become from reading you.

Dear Jack, you have no idea how greatful I am to you, and your words on my page, they always brighten my day! thank you so much, till soon, when it's review time for me :D

[Sir Joe]

After reading this poem, Amy Lowell's imagistic work entitled Patterns came into my mind. The theme in that poem is almost the same with the theme in this poem of yours (as far as my reading is concerned). There is a big difference between the two works, though. Lowell's is lengthy and filled with images (well, of course, she was part of the literary trend called IMAGISM) while yours is brief but carries something heavy. Not all writers can produce great impact by just using a minimum number of words. And I salute you by having done so.

I so love the theme for it speaks of a very common dilemma which many of us have probably already faced: to follow your heart or to follow the dictates of the society?

This work of yours is thought-provoking. My mind is coming across different interpretations. Did you intend me to undergo such mind-blow? LOL
Your style of being not-so direct to the point is creating a brain-twisting effect on me. And I kinda like it. LOL

I enjoyed your piece. =)

Hey Joe, thank you so much for this most educative, and honest review, I so appreciate you. :) yes, I am in a state of new revulutionair poetry, in shorter pieces, if you read my older ones, on this site, they are all long, and confusing, but they have a message, each and everyone.... :) so Lowell's is more lengthy yes, I know, but that is just a mood "catcher" I guess. Poets, are really the most weird but lovely creatures on earth i think... each and everyone is different, but, they all have a story to speak, to tell..... and some hide in between the lines, some hide into all.... and don't dare to speak in public and cover up in caracters. Others are just so openly it freaks another out.... it just is awesome how different we are. (I think). This I wrote after seeing a documentary about children, young adolocents, in the age of 15-20, who are totally lost about their feelings, in society, and split into other personalities, and wrong behaviour, so it inspired me to write about. I love your review, you dig deeper than the most on here, and that's a treasure itself. Even with different interpretations, you're always welcome to spread them here, I love to make people think and argue. :) I'm a puzzle yes, I did made you think at least, love that to see.... on here, and you did a great reply. Thank you my friend for being around :) - Elisa

[Sir Joe]

You are most welcome, Elisa. A poet should help another poet out. There is no room for competition here, only for improvement. Constructive reviews should be given to those who deserve them. In return, I thank you for appreciating my review on this nice poem of yours and for letting me have a taste of it. Well, that's my other way of saying "Write more, please!" =)

So so right you're, no never it is a competition, I can bow for you now, I'm not here to win anything, just to spread my little thoughts, I can really hate people who are here just for publishing, and "EGO STROKING" so wrong... you certainly will be read by spontain behaviout (more my motto). You know, sometimes, I'm in the top, just without sending read requests, and forcing reviews, and then I can say to myself, I can be really proud, just of what I did, it was meant, yes meant by people. Nothing is more important for me than honesty and true souls like you, who support eachother on a honest base on this site. You may be always as honest as you love, and like, I'm here to learn, (not a naitive English speaker myself) too European for it, but when I can learn from a fellow poet, I'm in.......... you're grand! thanks x

*behaviour, typo..... ;)

[Sir Joe]

hehehe I'm really so glad we've crossed paths. Same here, I also am not here for bragging or for winning. I'm here just to express my thoughts, share my works, learn from other writers and vice versa. Now I know why you earned such a good reputation here. I'll be glad if I hear more from you. I'm just right here. =)

[Robbie~xoxo~]

OMG! This is on point with the "web of self lies"...I felt this one to the core..
The doubts and "hungry wolves" out to get you... sadly, this could be the demise of society...Amazing write..very intriguing!

Yes, sis, I feel those wolves in me, in others..... so many times people don't choose what they really want, and I don't know what it is, society mostly, parents, who have influence, but what the heck, if they love to do what they want, why there is such a lack of freedom in this world you know? i hate this, and I have the luck I have such parents who were hippies, and really let me free.... in all i wanted to do.... it made me where I am now. And I'm happy of that. xoxoxo thank you for your most provoking review, you have a gift sis, I know your parents, are lovely as mine!!!!