Mirror

A Story by

He was no Prince. He was my mirror.

“Till death do us part …”

I promised. And I certainly had no intension of breaking that one although all of my previous has been broken. That is my problem. No one should ever trust me ‘cause I don’t deserve their faith. I am such unfaithful. You may very easily be convinced of my innocence at the first glimpse of my watery eyes, but they are not the mirror of my heart. The black swan dances in the darkness… seducing every good will, and you can never catch her. Huh!

I was happy watching the good people down on their knees, watching the true agony in their eyes, knowing every pain they show is piercing their heart. And I laughed at their stupidity. It was their choice of believing me, wasn’t it? What a kidish behavior. My cruel, lovely passion never ended. It grew more hungry gradually and I helped it to swallow all the innocence around me.

When to a bunch of people I had lost my existence, he entered my dark world. And for a single moment there was light. A little bit though. I wanted it to go… I was so used to the darkness. But slowly my eyes soothed. And I started to like it, to fire it more. What a stubborn it was! I used up all my power, to the extreme, and I felt, like ever, I had won. I enjoyed the wildness in his eyes, his crazy touch over my silky skin, and faster breath. I laughed a satisfaction. He, with his soft tender voice, whispered in my years, “Yours forever”. I shivered. It was deep, it was heartfelt, that melted the last piece of darkness in my heart. I thought at last, the Prince had won over the black swan. And I replied to his ears, “Till death do us part…” Then we dived into the ocean …

He changed me. He made me myself. Or he made me something else than myself. But I learned, I can mistake. I mistook his eyes, I mistook his voice, I mistook his body, I mistook his love. He was no Prince. He was my mirror. Cruel, oh how cruel! He was what I had been. Playing with my heart, convincing me his love and I lost myself. What the stupid of me! But I won’t blame him, blame myself. I won’t beg, I’ll suffer. I won’t cry, I’ll hold it back. Just the way the good people had. What relevance in saving a bad like me? Huh!