Leaving Home

The sunlight warm had cast a charm ,
on my mind today
I could hear aloud and clear ,
please don't go away .

 

I looked around but none I found ,
save the oldest garden tree ,
it seemed somehow every outstretched bough ,
was waving back at me.

 

It pained my heart but I had to start ,
I opened the gate to go ,
every step I took I turned to look ,
my pace so very slow .

 

As I waved goodbye I heard a sigh ,
as wind blew through the grass
A helpless voice ,"I have no choice ,
you may pass you may pass".

 

Reviews

[Deviant Works]

Utterly enchanting and beautiful... I am struck speechless by the emotions in this poem. My eyes filled with tears as I came to the very end, which I must say was closed absolutely superbly. In truth, I was just blown away by the last two lines, without a doubt they left a gut-wrenching impact. There is no place like home. Nowhere better to be but in the one place that holds many of your fondest of memories. I love this piece, Abhijit. Amazingly written.

[Lily Mae]

I love your use of nature in your process of having to walk away from that part of your life into the next phase of your life. I love the beauty that is used and I could feel your deep sigh, and see the grass for myself. That's how beautifully descriptive you are :)

[Chloe..Across the Unive..]

Wonderful poem .. the tree not wanting to see one leave..
Beautiful sentiments with a sadness at the end... leaving home is never easy ..

Chloe

[Narnie]

How apt that the tree is the upright in this before you leave. It adds the roots, the permanence that when or if you return, something will have never changed but just grown a little older. It seemed very serene and calm, Abhijit, with an underlying nervousness - perfect emotion for the subject matter.

[Neva Flores Smith - Cha..]

oh yes, this is wondeful! What a flow and rhythm you have here

[Nothing Personal]

Life listens to life's calls. Unsaid boundaries overcome with a sense of mysticism and the call is genuine and heartfelt. A well crafted, dual layered piece for me..Quite the winner poem in my opinion. I liked it :-)

[SM Davis]

Wow! This is fantastic! It is rare that I find a rhyming poem that makes me stop and read and read. This did that. Very well done!

[Julie Beth]

wow this was amazing you did an outstanding job i enjoyed reading this great job :D

[pheasant]

Reaches deep feelings of connection and brings to life what many believe to be inanimate.

[OT]

ah this is very nice indeed, real experience - poems crafted from past - it'll resonate within everyone - leaving home - the ABCB rhyme works well here - the image is slightly poignant, relating to the topic - bittersweet - adventures and also loss! nice!! (only thing I'd say is to change the "dont" to "don't" though this doesn't affect the read at all)! great work!

[Scarlet Pulse]

This is an amazing piece of writing. You used striking words that worked together that created a wonderful read. Thank you.