Heart of Glass. [Chapter Nine.]

A smile couldn't be brought to my face anymore, and I felt both mocked and ridiculed by reality soon afterwards. Satisfactory and what I wanted to achieve in this life were out of the question for me. There was too much distance between us to be measured out now, whether he was oblivious to it, or had it permanently registered in his mind. The ring on my finger felt like a sin. As though it shouldn't have been placed there in the first place. I found it humorous how one, small object could make a person feel like the worst sinner in the entire world.  It was incapable of being on my finger without it weighing a ton and sending a horrid burning sensation throughout me. Whenever I took in the full sight of it, my eyes were unable to lock on something else.

Somehow, it also felt right. Some of the precious, elated moments were trapped inside, which also made it a part of me. Not knowing which side my of my mind to partake, - or which side to be involved in - I exhaled distressingly, sensing stirring and other muttered words behind me. No longer did I care about what he had to say, though I knew he found no knowledge of why I was being so bitter and cruel towards him. Perhaps, this is the way I should act to him. After all, he had still not provided me with a responsible explanation, nor had he tried to back himself up to calm my nerves and lift the stress off of my shoulders.

Still, a pathetic attempt to pack my bags and execute the idea of moving out seemed so . . . harsh. Instead, I decided on only moving halfway, taking a mere step at a time. There were more moments to just breathe and let things go easily that way. The ring was easily - though not so easily - slipped off of my finger and dropped into a small bag, threatening tears persevering to be held back. With quick, yet heartbreaking, steps towards him, I leaned in, watching his chest rise and fall as his snores became softer and more mute than before. Impulsively, I felt disgusted, but remained in the same exact spot that I was standing at. With multiple, powerful tears ready to overtake me being held back, I kissed his forehead and forced myself to proceed to the next room, my movements losing more and more momentum as the seconds continued to drag on.

Hesitance wandered through me as unsure thoughts swam through my mind, blocking determined ones out. My heart race picked up as shaky hands found the door, fingers curling around the knob. As I began to open the door, allowing sunlight to drip and peek in, my heart felt as though it would surely stop. After a few pondering thoughts, the door flew open, the force from my fingers more forceful than intended. When I looked out, however, swallowing a lump in my throat, the sun instantly attacked my eyes, aliting all of my face ever so delicately.

The clean air that had burst through my nostrils had never felt so refreshing and pure. The sidewalk seemed to scream my name as my gaze was fixated on it. Before the thoughts could become final and a foot was an inch out the door to freedom, the door was slammed shut in front of me, blocking my only escape, as a hand was gripped on my arm. I spun around, noticing two red, tear-filled eyes gazing longingly - desperately - straight towards me.

Author's Note

Ignore grammar problems.
I also apologize for the length.