Beyond Visual

about a woman who has been so badly scarred she believes she can never be loved again

 

I Am Bruised

I Am Broken

Take My Heart As A Token

You Deserve A Soul That Shines

With A Face More Beautiful Than Mine.

You Inspired me With Your Words,

I Loved Every One I Heard,

I Loved Every Kiss You Gave,

But I've Been Struck By A Tidal Wave,

I Loved You As The Years Went By,

But Now I Daren't Try.

There Are No Doctors That Could Mend Me

No Man That Could Love Me

And No Hero That Will Save Me.

Reviews

[JP thinks the WC is apt..]

It's a melancholy piece that genuinely tugs at the heart strings and which is impeccably rhymed. I do think the speaker is being a little hard on herself but her voice evokes great sympathy. That's why this piece achieves its goal so emphatically.

An effective poem.

P.S: Thanks for the review, sorry it took me so long to reply but I've been a bit preoccupied over the Bank Holiday weekend. Hope you had a good'un. James x.

[Dr. Wood ?]

very sad piece...I loved the capitals..it somehow added importance to it all..and more importantly..it was an excellent poem....I get away with writing the funny stuff, can't do sad very well...

strong and direct

good form, well imparted message

good piece

[bluessadmood]

that was so nice but so sad too ,i love it ,thank you

[Jason]

The tone is definitely one of lost hope for this sad woman. I seems as though she has a lot to offer, but she has trouble convincing the most important person; herself. I feel for the beaten woman, however i want to give her advice and tell her that the past belongs in the past! Great write young lady!

[VenkatRamanan]

melancholic....words are powerfull...well rhymed..

[Shadows of Sight]

True love see's through all. The body a shell, that the inner soul shines brightly from within. A woman such as this, i envy. For all she has to do is find one to love her, and she can know that it's pure.

Wonderful write!

[James Takeo Panton]

Powerful and emotional.....excellent work....

[TL Boehm]

real, raw writing here. It is so sad when some one feels this way....but it happens. You have captured that sense of hopelessness.

[Travis Lawrence]

Interesting how you used your capital letters. This poem is sad and drenched in self pity. Good write!