Anything, Anything, Simply to Have You.

My little love poem... give it a read? Thanks. :)

Do you love me, my dear?

Do you love me, do you love me?

But darling, you can’t even hear,

My little song of,

“Do you love me, do you love me?”

 

And I wonder every night

What on Earth it would be like,

To cradled in his arms,

I would let my guard down; become unarmed.

My darling, I would do,

Anything, anything,

Simply to,

Have you,

Darling I would do,

Anything, anything,

Simply to have,

You.

Author's Note

~Critical reviews preferred, but if you liked it, please do say so~ :)

Reviews

[Mackenzie Brooke]

So adorable its an innocent sweet take on love. Wanting to love some one and wanting them to love you back. i agree with Pixie Poison it should be "To be cradled in his arms" for such a young soul you have quite the writing style. :)

[Rowen Cameron]

Wonderfully done. There's a sense of innocence and purity running through it which makes it lovely to read.

Just 2 little things on a critical note: there's a lot of commas used at the end of lines where it doesn't need them which interrupts the flow of the piece e.g. "You can't even hear, My little song of", and "Simply to have, You." You won't lose any of the meaning or emotion by removing some of them. Also the 3rd line of the 2nd stanza would sound better as "To be cradled in his arms" (or is it a typo?)

Other than those things, a brilliant piece of work. Keep it up! :)