To you I wonder, If you could see me, I would call you I would call you to see if you would hear me If you could hear me would you listen? If you listened would you understand without judging me? Judging me on who I am, what I do, and how I hear you I hear you with fear inside me Fear that if I listened I would fail to understand I would not understand how you could hear,
Hear, listen and understand without judging me Still, my heart wonders,
Wonders if you would forgive me Forgive me because I love you If only you could open your eyes and see me I wonder Love from me
This is the first ever poem I wrote. I always like to honour it by keeping it in my vault, kind of a door to the vault of the mysterious poems... ha-ha I say too much I know:)
My Review
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Very beautiful and mysterious, it gave me the feel of a ghost trying to get through to someone they loved, desperately seeking forgiveness. Well done, and amazing write! ^^
For a first..not to bad but leaves a lot to question..I was so young when I started rhyming..I do not remember what I might have said..My mom and Grand mother were both published poets. Valentine
Without considering that this is your first poem, it is of good quality. Some other time I might share the multiplicity of meaning I interpret from even a first reading. Poetry must have depth, as it seeks to tell much in only a few words. Most "poems" nowadays a randomly thrown words by bored individuals which has little or no depth and mystery. This piece, my friend, is poetry.
Posted 11 Years Ago
11 Years Ago
Wow, Thank you for reading, and for your kind comments. I really appreciate your review. This is wha.. read moreWow, Thank you for reading, and for your kind comments. I really appreciate your review. This is what makes me write more :)
Well, writing about myself is one of the few things I can't do. I love writing - I guess that's why I'm here. Nature comes second, or maybe not. I think I love nature more than writing--No, I love wri.. more..