I Wonder

To you
I wonder,
If you could see me, I would call you
I would call you to see if you would hear me
If you could hear me would you listen?
If you listened would you understand without judging me?
Judging me on who I am, what I do, and how I hear you
I hear you with fear inside me
Fear that if I listened I would fail to understand
I would not understand how you could hear, 

Hear, listen and understand without judging me
Still, my heart wonders, 

Wonders if you would forgive me
Forgive me because I love you
If only you could open your eyes and see me
I wonder
Love from me

Author's Note

This is the first ever poem I wrote. I always like to honour it by keeping it in my vault, kind of a door to the vault of the mysterious poems... ha-ha I say too much I know:)

Reviews

[David Scott]

The logic is flawed a bit...? Still, I get what your saying. Nobody will ever be able to know you until you take a chance. So, we all have to move while we wonder... Take a chance... Have faith... Etc ...

[J. Write]

Thank you :)

[oxo]

wow. the style is unique. never heard or read anything like this: continuous, a thought after another, all intertwined.. even the first and last words were like open and close quotation marks. amazing. :)

[J. Write]

Thank you :)

[Erinne S.]

This is an excellent piece! I liked how you tied the lines together by taking the ending from one to start the beginning of another. Loved it!

~Erinne

[J. Write]

Thank you :)

[Tex]

this is the first?!? My god. this is wonderful. I just love it. I love the concept (written as a letter), I love how innocent it is, I love how vulnerable a place it is written from. It is a wonderful piece.

frame it and mount it on a wall!

[J. Write]

Thank you :)

[AleyshaRosa]

I wonder about this poem, I honestly due (mind the irony)
Your structure is truly brilliant: begging the next verse with a segment of the last, especially when you began with a question.
It's how a thought process actually works, in my mind anyway...
Very well done
Koodoos

[J. Write]

Thank you :)

[AleyshaRosa]

Anytime, J. Write

[quinfinn]

this is full of longing and uncertainty. it is sweet, deliberate and honest to a fault. your feelings within are truly and deeply understood. well done, poet! even for your first, this is a triumph.

[J. Write]

Thank you :)

[kublakhan27]

This is too good to keep in the vault, especially for a first poem :)

[J. Write]

Thank you :)

[Tarry Franck]

Nicely done!

[J. Write]

Thank you :)

[Elisa]

This is very well done. I like how you presented it visually with the different lengths in the lines. The two "I wonder"s encircle the poem, making it feel complete. Lastly, you applied your meaning well and had an obvious style.

[J. Write]

Thank you :)

[Chandra Sekhar Vedula]

awwwhh....Lovely man..!!

[J. Write]

Thank you :)