You Beat Me

You Beat Me

A Poem by J. Write


“Let’s play a game,” you said
“What game?” I asked
“Whoever cries first, loses”
“No,” I shook my head
“Come on, one last dance”
I smiled and gave in
You took my hand, and led me to the dance floor
Reluctantly, I followed
Suddenly, we were swinging from side to side
Swinging to the tune of hearts beats
Our blood rushing and  pulse racing
“There’s no music,” I said
You chuckled, pulling me closer as if we weren’t close enough
“Music is you and me ,” you said
I searched your eyes and saw myself in yours " watching you
You stroked my cheek as we stood still
“I love you,” you said
“I love you more”
“Enough to let me go?” you asked
“Why should I let you go?”
“Your world and mine are different now " Let me go,”
Right then,clouds formed in my eyes
As you faded, I came back to my world
“It was a dream,” I murmured. “Or was it?” I sobbed
You beat me

© 2012 J. Write


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Reviews

An interesting poem. It had a very strong sense of intrigue, making me wonder more and more about the two characters as I read, leaving me at the end with a hanging question. Good work.

Posted 12 Years Ago


lets start

Posted 12 Years Ago


An intriguing mix of drama and poetry...the story and the couple are very mysterious, and almost demand more than one reading for the scene to sink in...well done^^

Posted 12 Years Ago


This was so sad! But wonderful at the same time. :) Good job.

Posted 12 Years Ago


Beautiful to read :)

Posted 12 Years Ago


Very enjoyable. The two characters reminded me of the one's in your story.

Posted 12 Years Ago


J. Write

12 Years Ago

My God! I cant believe you got that...thank you :)
Oh my god, this brought tears to my eyes, but this was very well written.

Posted 12 Years Ago


You wrote a profound poem here. Simple enough for a caual read and deep enough to dive in and enjoy some exploration of the human condition. Well done!

Posted 12 Years Ago


wow...this is beautiful i love it from beginning to end

Posted 12 Years Ago


Very nice. I didn't expect that end. Sad yet wondrous.

Posted 12 Years Ago



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3985 Views
52 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 3 Libraries
Added on November 6, 2012
Last Updated on November 6, 2012

Author

J. Write
J. Write

London, United Kingdom



About
Well, writing about myself is one of the few things I can't do. I love writing - I guess that's why I'm here. Nature comes second, or maybe not. I think I love nature more than writing--No, I love wri.. more..

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