The Stormy Night

A sonnet which is meant to feel akin to Hopkins' sprung rhythm.

Praise be to Hopkins

I woke to the billowing battle-breeze, booming brontide

Drawn from dreams decoded, and slipping serpentine

Through thick wardrobes and war-chests: uncouth, unclean,

But wordlessly welcome still; arms wanting, whooshing wide,

The air always adroitly arcadian, and yet bro-

ken into baleful bright-bursts, that hamper hypermnesia and lead one astray.

Now upon the tantalizing terrace: truth! in the grumbling, grainy grey 

Lethal lightning lashes down and sizzles skin to silence.

Drip drop, drip drop, drip drop, drip drop, drip drop.

Until a heartbeat hums again, wimpling weakly 

Under the fried flesh - a crusty casket STOP.

Now the morning meets the mire, and daylight drenches the deathly

To forgotten places and spaces - known now as a nonstop

Novel open to only Them: brontide infinity.

Reviews

[Sympathy Heart]

Very unique style I love it. So dark!

[Windhover]

Thank you!

[andrew mitchell]

an entertaining write and so different in a style i'm not familiar but works so well

[Windhover]

Thank you. I'm glad you like it!

[mattavelli]

This was a fun read. What sort of sonnet is it?

[Windhover]

Petrarchan. Though since I'm following Hopkins' model, there are elements of Old English poetry as well, notably the alliteration and caesuras.

[mattavelli]

Petrarchan is my favorite sonnet form to write. Thanks for sharing this one. Its different. Post some more for us. :)

[Windhover]

It's a great form! Glad you liked this poem. I'll hopefully be sharing more work on here soon. At the moment, I'm somewhat testing the waters to see what the community is like.

[mattavelli]

Welcome! Have you found any other good writing sites?

[Windhover]

Not too many great ones, honestly. I mean, there are okay places to post things, but if getting feedback is what you want, then I've had a hard time finding those places myself. That's why I'm testing out this site. It's nice to know people actually read what you write.

[mattavelli]

I suggest including in your author's note, what sort of feedback you are looking for.

[Windhover]

Well, there's nothing really specific. I just desire any feedback. General thoughts and comments are fine, but so is something more in-depth. That's why I didn't specify.

[mattavelli]

Ya, "General thoughts and comments are fine, but so is something more in-depth.".... great author's note. You'll get more honest feedback if you request it.

[Windhover]

All right, noted. Thanks.